Both ancient thinkers and contemporary researchers agree: strong interpersonal relationships are vital for achieving happiness. Among the various relationships we cultivate, friendships play a particularly crucial role in our overall well-being. In my pursuit of happiness, I’ve adopted several resolutions aimed at nurturing my friendships, including “Be more forgiving,” “Be present,” “Make three new friends,” “Connect friends with each other,” “Celebrate birthdays,” “Avoid gossip,” and “Say hi more often.”
Here are eight psychological principles that have proven valuable as I work to nurture and reinforce my friendships.
Triadic Closure
The concept of “triadic closure” suggests that individuals are likely to form friendships with the friends of their friends, creating a satisfying web of connections. This interconnectedness not only strengthens friendships but also fosters a sense of community. I’ve made a conscious effort to connect my friends with one another, and to also befriend those who are friends of my friends. (On a side note, the phrase “befriend friends’ friends” is amusingly convoluted!)
Emotional Contagion
“Emotional contagion” refers to the phenomenon where we subconsciously absorb the emotions of those around us. If someone is cheerful and energetic, it tends to uplift the spirits of others; conversely, negative emotions can spread more easily. Recognizing this, I strive to be a source of positivity and happiness.
Mere Exposure Effect
The “mere exposure effect” highlights how increased familiarity can lead to greater affection. The more we encounter someone, the more we tend to like them. Thus, I make it a point to engage in activities where I can repeatedly see the same faces, fostering deeper connections.
Fundamental Attribution Error
This psychological principle explains our tendency to judge others’ actions as reflections of their character while downplaying external influences. For instance, I might think someone is rude for cutting in line, not realizing they are in a hurry due to a family emergency. Understanding this helps me cultivate empathy.
Warmth
Reciprocal attraction means we tend to like those who express warmth and friendliness towards us. By being genuinely excited to see others, I find that it encourages similar feelings in them, enhancing our interactions.
Smiling
It may seem simple, but research indicates that smiling significantly increases how friendly others perceive us. Adding to this, an expressive demeanor, nodding, leaning forward, and using a warm tone can further enhance our approachability.
Subliminal Touching
Studies have shown that subtle, unnoticed touches can significantly elevate a person’s mood and feelings towards the toucher. A casual touch on the arm or back during conversation can foster a deeper sense of connection.
Situation Evocation
This principle revolves around the idea that our behavior can influence how others respond to us. For instance, if I maintain a positive, lighthearted attitude, it is likely to evoke similar behavior in those around me, creating a more joyful environment.
Many believe that friendships should develop effortlessly, and that focusing on them feels forced or artificial. However, in the hustle of daily life, it’s easy to overlook our most meaningful relationships. Since committing to my happiness resolutions, I’ve noticed my friendships have grown stronger and more enriching. The effort is undoubtedly worthwhile.
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Summary
Building and strengthening friendships can significantly enhance our happiness. By understanding psychological principles such as emotional contagion, warmth, and the mere exposure effect, we can take intentional steps to cultivate deeper connections. Simple actions like smiling, reaching out, and fostering interconnections can lead to more fulfilling social interactions.