Menu Parenting
By Claire Thompson
Updated: Dec. 3, 2020
Originally Published: May 14, 2014
We all know a mom who can effortlessly pull out snacks from her purse at a moment’s notice or who seems to fit everything she needs into one of those charming wristlets that the rest of us abandoned when we transitioned to diaper bags. The variety of mom purses is almost as diverse as the moms themselves. So, which type do you carry?
The Medic Bag
This purse is overflowing with hand sanitizer and a plethora of character Band-Aids. It’s the perfect choice for moms with accident-prone kids, germaphobes, and women who enjoy providing impromptu first aid at the playground as a way to connect with fellow moms of clumsy children.
The Sideliner
With kids involved in numerous sports, this mom has ditched the typical purse for a robust duffel-sized bag. Carrying heavy water bottles and likely dirty knee pads means she can’t afford to be too delicate with her belongings.
The Lost and Found
Mom’s essentials are likely buried in this cavernous bag, but to locate her Original ChapStick, she must sift through a mountain of items her kids have abandoned, old toys discovered under car seats, and trash they’ve handed her as if she were a walking wastebasket.
The Snack Bar
Gum, candy, crackers, granola bars, juice boxes—this mom has everything on hand, understanding that nothing ignites fury like a hungry child far from home and mealtime. Typically carried in a backpack-style bag, she needs both hands ready to clean up after her kids’ frequent snack spills.
The Diva Drawstring
Reminiscent of a time when she could fit all her necessities in a pocket, this little purse holds just enough room for her driver’s license, lipstick, and makeup removal pads—perfect for wiping away her child’s mac and cheese stains.
The Junk Drawer
Since moms rarely clean out their bags—who has time for that?—this hobo-style bag is crammed with broken birthday party favors (which her kids believe she can fix with the Super Glue hiding somewhere inside), mysterious keys, and a tangled mess of paper clips and hair ties that always elude her when needed.
The Teller Window
Peek inside this mom’s purse and you’ll discover receipts, important forms she meant to complete, her checkbook, a couple of Dum Dum lollipops, and a plethora of ballpoint pens. It’s like waiting in line at the bank, just waiting for someone to pitch the latest loan rates.
The Carry-On
This mom carries extra clothes for the entire family, spare shoes, a toiletries bag, and sunscreen. Whether she’s just incredibly organized or plotting a spontaneous getaway, this bag ensures she’s ready for anything—whether it’s a last-minute trip or a post-meltdown wardrobe change.
The Toy Chest
For moms whose patience wears thin with every “I’m bored” uttered by their kids, having a portable Toy R Us is crucial. A rotating selection of action figures, fast food toys, and emergency bubble wands keeps the kids entertained—and helps maintain Mom’s sanity. Yet, the only toy they truly want is Mom’s phone.
In the end, our belongings often aren’t really ours, are they? Regardless of the size, shape, or cleanliness of your purse, it likely serves as your Motherhood Survival Kit. As you navigate the joys and challenges of mom life, remember that whatever type of bag you carry, if you’re at the playground later, feel free to join me. I might trade you some fruit snacks for a Dora Band-Aid for my toddler’s imaginary boo-boo. I think I stashed some in here somewhere.
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Summary:
This article humorously categorizes the various types of mom purses, from the Medic Bag filled with first-aid supplies to the Toy Chest brimming with entertainment options for kids. Each purse reflects the unique challenges and experiences of motherhood, emphasizing that our bags often serve as essential survival kits in our journey as moms.