- “Don’t make me come over there.” I’m really reluctant to pause what I’m doing to come to you, so please just behave.
- “Because I said so.” Honestly, I’m at a loss for a better explanation.
- “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” I’m hoping for at least 30 seconds of silence from you.
- “Stop that this instant!” If you can just stop now, we can pretend this moment never happened.
- “Don’t make me turn this car around!” I’m bluffing here; if we turn back now, we’ll miss out on groceries, diapers, and yes, even that much-needed wine. Let’s keep going, and I’ll treat you to a cookie later.
- “Don’t forget to say please and thank you.” Honestly, I’m unsure how I’ll react if you don’t say them, so just say it! We’ll both look good, and everyone wins.
- “Eat your veggies, and you’ll grow up big and strong!” I’m really stressing about what to tell your pediatrician if you don’t eat healthy foods, but I can’t lie either. Just a couple bites, please? I’ll throw in a cookie as a bribe.
- “You are just fine.” You’re okay, right? Go ahead and play, jump around, and just act normal.
- “Do you want a little cheese with that whine?” Wouldn’t it be great if you could pour me a glass of wine instead?
- “I am the parent, and you are the kid.” Sure, it sounds condescending, but I’m really just giving myself a pep talk; I’m not even addressing you.
- “Let’s try not to eat off the floor.” Honestly, I don’t mind if you do; just don’t let anyone else find out!
- “I would never have gotten away with that at your age.” I can’t recall my own childhood, but it sounds believable, right?
- “I’m going to count to three, and you better be in your bed.” I’m completely drained, and all I want is for everyone to settle down. I’ll count slowly, hoping it’ll work because I’m out of ideas after that.
- “Goodnight, stay in bed.” Please just stay in bed. I’m so exhausted that I might pretend you’re in bed if you get up, so just close your eyes and drift off to sleep. Please?
- “I love you.” My love for you is immeasurable, and I sincerely hope I’m managing this motherhood thing well.
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Summary
This article humorously explores the common phrases mothers often use, revealing the hidden meanings behind their words. From trying to maintain order to expressing love, these phrases capture the essence of motherhood.