For someone like me, overflowing with enthusiasm, it often feels like my excitement is at odds with being perceived as “cool.” As a child, I was full of spirit but also gripped by fears. It was only after facing those fears that I could truly experience joy, and even then, it took years for my enthusiasm to come to the surface.
In my late twenties and early thirties, I finally found the words to articulate my emotions and learned effective strategies for managing situations that once felt overwhelming. As I gained confidence and faced my fears, I rediscovered things I once avoided. The earnestness with which I expressed my excitement often seemed more suited to a child than to an adult. I was told that an adult’s unfiltered enthusiasm—like the thrill of embarking on an adventure or meeting someone admired—was considered uncool. But I refuse to believe I’m uncool.
I derive joy from experiences rather than disappointment. Engaging in profound conversations and learning from those more knowledgeable than myself uplifts me. The more I immerse myself in these interactions, the more I trust that life is inherently good. I don’t pretend to be disinterested, nor do I come off as overly eager; I simply embrace genuine fascination with others and their insights. With my past struggles, I now focus on all that is possible, even if it seems unattainable.
Aloofness, a trait I truly detest, stands in stark contrast to enthusiasm. It’s often deemed “cool,” but it creates distance and can leave people feeling alienated.
A few years back, I had a conversation with a younger friend, Emily, who revealed that while she thought I was “cool for my age” (I’m in my forties), she also viewed me as “sort of a nerd.” When I probed further, she explained, “It’s because you show your enthusiasm.” That realization saddened me—not just for myself but for the concept of enthusiasm itself.
Aloofness is cold; it isolates. I’m sensitive to how others feel, so I strive to create a welcoming atmosphere. This desire to connect can sometimes make me feel out of place, especially when others perceive my enthusiasm as odd. What is an enthusiastic person to do?
A dear friend, Alex, is unabashedly enthusiastic and frequently tells everyone he loves them. While this may create discomfort for some, he expresses his feelings sincerely, without expecting anything in return. His enthusiasm spills over, an uncontainable expression of joy.
Part of my enthusiasm stems from a desire to alleviate the fears that once held me back. I extend my friendliness, believing that others might also share my apprehensions. Ironically, the very enthusiasm I showcase to help others fit in is often what makes me feel out of place.
People label me as weird or nerdy because I embrace ideas, experiences, and people with open arms. I’ve attempted to tone it down, but it’s challenging to suppress such energy. While others may judge my enthusiasm, what truly surprises me is that after years of feeling unhappy and fearful, I’ve blossomed into a genuinely enthusiastic individual.
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In summary, embracing enthusiasm can sometimes lead to feeling uncool in a world that often values aloofness. However, true happiness lies in authenticity and the joy that comes from genuine connections with others.