23 Surefire Ways to Frustrate Your Child

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Looking to annoy your child for some reason? No judgment here—it’s surprisingly simple.

  1. Start their day by waking them up in the morning.
  2. Use your own saliva to wipe their face clean.
  3. Mistakenly toss their current homework into the recycling bin, thinking it was the old one.
  4. Announce limits on their screen time, and actually stick to it.
  5. Ignore their call from school when they’re feeling sick because your phone was silenced, leaving them with the kid nobody wants to sit next to in the nurse’s office.
  6. Forget to keep that one piece of artwork they cherished, which was crucial for their happiness.
  7. Ask them to take care of feeding the dog, even if that’s their sole task in life.
  8. Attempt to help with their homework using completely different terminology than what their teacher uses.
  9. Stop reading at a suspenseful moment in a Harry Potter book. “And just when they were about to confront the monster… Sweet dreams, darling!”
  10. Suggest they change their outfit when they’re determined to wear that old, shrunken sweater of their dad’s paired with those raggedy pants.
  11. Remind them they have homework to do.
  12. Keep only “boring” snacks in the pantry.
  13. Allow holes to develop in their favorite socks and fail at repairing them.
  14. Refrain from getting the new Skylander’s Swap Force characters, claiming you’ve already spent too much on regular ones.
  15. Get dizzy from watching their Minecraft roller coaster and miss the “coolest part” as you close your eyes to avoid nausea.
  16. At dinner, insist they use utensils.
  17. Make them use a napkin instead of their shirt to clean up.
  18. Request they use polite language while speaking.
  19. Demand they just sit down in a chair.
  20. Try to explain topics they’re currently learning in school, even though they might know more than you do, despite your advanced degree in Physical Therapy and experience with human anatomy.
  21. Offer only dull viewing options and tell them how lucky they are, reminiscing about your own limited options as a kid, only to see their interest fade away.
  22. Request that they aim a little better when using the toilet.
  23. Break the news that it’s time for bed.

For further insights into parenting, consider checking out resources like this comprehensive guide on pregnancy and home insemination: Women’s Health.

In summary, if you’re looking to frustrate your child, simply play into common parenting pitfalls. It can be all too easy to inadvertently push their buttons.

For more on navigating the intricacies of parenthood, check out this post about home insemination kits. Additionally, if you’re curious about your baby’s arrival date, this site provides expert information on the topic.