Dear friend,
You know I embrace a more holistic lifestyle. Whether you label it crunchy, granola, or alternative parenting, I embody the spirit of attachment parenting. I can nurse my baby in a sling while managing a shopping cart filled with toddlers, all while they sip on organic juice boxes. I’m even brewing my own kombucha! If we were back in the 1960s, I’d be your quintessential free spirit.
But there’s one topic we’ve never really addressed—the elephant in the room, if you will. My children are fully vaccinated, while yours have never received a shot.
We tend to avoid discussions about vaccines for the same reason you might steer clear of political debates with relatives: there’s little common ground. I trust the scientific evidence supporting vaccines. I’ve read the inserts, scrutinized countless medical studies, and even delved into the nitty-gritty details, like the formaldehyde naturally present in the human body. In the end, I chose to align with the recommendations of the CDC, the AAP, the WHO, our pediatrician, and my son’s epidemiologist godmother: we vaccinate.
Conversely, you either lack trust in the science behind vaccines or adhere to alternative findings that I would argue are misleading. You may believe that the studies I reference are funded by pharmaceutical interests, while you rely on sources that I find questionable. Our perspectives diverge, with you convinced that I’m misinformed and that I’m putting my children at risk.
I value our friendship and don’t view you as foolish or willfully uninformed. You’ve conducted your own research to justify your decision, and while I disagree with your conclusions, I respect you enough to not just dismiss it with a cliché about parental choices. I believe my decision is correct while yours is misguided.
However, this difference of opinion doesn’t need to turn our friendship into a battleground. Recent measles outbreaks have raised concerns, and it’s essential we navigate this carefully.
I care for you deeply, but I don’t share the same affection for diseases. With even one case of measles reported within 500 miles, my children will avoid unvaccinated kids until they’ve received all recommended doses of the MMR vaccine. This isn’t a personal attack; it’s about keeping my kids safe. While you might think my concerns are exaggerated, I hope we can continue our friendship despite this disagreement.
We both know measles is highly contagious. Just as you worry about potential vaccine side effects, I’m apprehensive about illnesses like meningitis and encephalitis. I need to protect my children, and I trust you can understand that instinct. Expect a few missed playdates in the near future.
We have an unspoken agreement as parents—keeping sick kids at home is a courtesy. However, when it comes to unvaccinated children, the stakes feel higher. I’m not just concerned about current illnesses; I worry about what they might be carrying. If your family has been in contact with someone sick, let’s keep our kids apart.
And while it’s unlikely to be pertussis, I know you might be thinking, “But if your kids are vaccinated, what’s the worry?” Instead of diving into a comparative analysis of vaccine efficacy, I ask you to humor me on this one as a gesture of our friendship.
Also, if you plan to attend a pox party, please give me a heads-up. Varicella can be contagious before symptoms appear, and if you’re not planning to quarantine during the incubation period, I’d appreciate the notification so we can stay away.
In return, I’ll keep you informed about when my kids receive vaccinations. I understand your concerns regarding vaccine shedding. While I don’t share those apprehensions, I’ll let you know when my children get their MMR, varicella, and other live-virus vaccines. I believe it’s safe, except for specific circumstances like a bone marrow transplant. But I care about you and your children, and I want to honor your worries.
Most importantly, I commit to not being disrespectful. While I may not agree with your interpretation of the available science, we can still hold different views on vital public health issues and remain friends. Look at the dynamic between political commentators—James and Mary, for example. I intend to remain engaged in discussions about vaccines, but I promise to approach the topic with respect. We’re all just parents trying to make the best choices for our families. I can disagree with your choices without dismissing your intelligence.
I hope you can afford me the same courtesy.
In closing, navigating our differing views on vaccination is challenging, but it’s crucial for the sake of our friendship and the health of our families. If you want more information about home insemination, check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary: This article navigates the complex topic of vaccination choices between friends, emphasizing the importance of mutual respect despite differing beliefs. It acknowledges the emotional nature of the discussion while maintaining a focus on children’s health and safety.