Updated: Aug. 2, 2016
Originally Published: Jan. 12, 2014
I proudly identify as a feminist. Unfortunately, feminism has faced significant misunderstanding over the past few decades, often being perceived as synonymous with man-hating or radicalism. I can assure you, that is far from who I am. My envy lies not in what men possess, but rather in their financial advantages. In my view, feminism embodies the belief that women and men deserve equal treatment across all aspects of life.
I am married to a partner who treats me as an equal. If we appear to have defined gender roles—like him working while I care for our children—it is not a reflection of my worth but rather a practical financial decision.
This morning, I braved the rain to go grocery shopping. As I approached the store, balancing an umbrella, a 20-pound baby in his carrier, and the hand of my three-year-old, I noticed an older gentleman, perhaps in his sixties, standing by the entrance, merely observing. I assumed, as a fellow human being, he would hold the door open for me. (Note to self: Never assume.) He did not budge. As I prepared to set my baby carrier on the wet ground, I muttered, “Thanks for holding the door.” To which this fellow replied, “I thought women didn’t want doors opened for them anymore.”
Touché, sir. My desire for you to open the door isn’t because of my gender; it’s rooted in the principle of kindness. Good manners transcend gender; they are simply a matter of basic decency. When women demanded equal rights, some men misinterpreted this as a rejection of chivalry. This couldn’t be further from the truth.
As I raise my three sons, teaching them the distinction between ‘rescuing the princess’ and simply being considerate to others is crucial. Basic human decency shouldn’t vanish with the advancement of women’s rights. Regardless of whether you’re an elderly woman or a strong man, if you reach the door first, you should hold it open—because that’s just good manners.
Yes, my children might be a handful. They may engage in silly antics, forget their lunches, and sing the latest pop songs at the most inopportune moments, but they will also learn to assist anyone in need. Those are my kind of kids.
For more insights on parenting and the importance of good manners, check out our related post on 10 Reasons All Children Need Good Manners.
In summary, feminism should not be mistaken for the rejection of common courtesy. It’s about equality and kindness toward all individuals, irrespective of gender. Raising children with these values is essential to nurturing a more respectful society.