Recently, I’ve come across numerous humorous posts comparing the quest for new mom friends to the dating scene. There’s the playful banter, the compliments, and the relaxed vibe in conversations to avoid coming off as too serious. It’s not unlike the efforts guys make at a bar to convince you they’re not the creepy types.
Now that moms have mastered the art of connecting with one another, let’s discuss what NOT to do when you meet that one mom who seems perfect for you. You know the one: you both share a distaste for that big-box store but end up there anyway. You both love those hilarious cat memes circulating online. You even frequent the same coffee shop near the park where your kids play together. Everything appears to align.
Then, out of nowhere, you feel the sting of rejection—she’s just not that into you.
It’s much like the dating world, and just like in dating, the expectation is that you’ll handle it gracefully and move on to the next potential mom friend without harboring any resentment. You’re supposed to take the high road, right?
So, if you genuinely want to embrace that high road, here are some pointers on handling a friend breakup:
- No Stalking on Social Media: Let’s clarify: don’t obsessively check if your friend request has been accepted. Spoiler alert: it likely hasn’t because she’s just not that into you.
- Avoid Gossip: Resist the urge to discuss her aloofness or busyness with mutual acquaintances. It’s awkward to comment on her absence from your favorite coffee spot lately. Remember, she’s just not that into you.
- Maintain Your Dignity: Please don’t pretend she doesn’t exist at kids’ events. She can see you chatting with others while ignoring her. Say it with me: she’s just not that into you.
- Don’t Take It Personally: When you notice her getting cozy with a new mom at the playground, try not to feel slighted. Maybe they click better, maybe you tried too hard, or maybe it’s simply a mismatch. Sometimes, a less-than-ideal friend isn’t the right fit, and that’s okay.
The first time I heard the phrase “she’s just not that into you,” it struck me as harsh. But really, it’s liberating to realize that if someone drops you like a hot potato, they probably weren’t a true friend to begin with. She’s just not that into you because, frankly, she can’t see how wonderful you are.
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In summary, the landscape of forming friendships as a mom can feel daunting and reminiscent of dating. Yet, it’s crucial to recognize when someone isn’t reciprocating your interest. Embrace the experience, learn from it, and move forward with confidence.