Angela from ‘Who’s the Boss?’ made motherhood appear effortlessly glamorous. You land a top-tier job, have a baby, hire a charming (retired baseball player) housekeeper, balance parenting with ease, and navigate it all with only a few awkward nude scenes. As a child, I envied her life.
However, once I found myself in a similar situation—starting my career and welcoming a child—I realized the truth was far from what it seemed. It was anything but simple.
Initially, I thought that reading numerous “having it all” books would prepare me, but I quickly learned that having a baby didn’t come with a manual about whether I’d thrive at home or continue in my career. Many women don’t even get to choose. When I returned to work after my twelve weeks of maternity leave, I was met with an overwhelming wave of emotions that I had never encountered before. The moment I delivered my baby, I also seemed to deliver a hefty dose of guilt.
I first felt it as I closed the door behind me on my way back to work. Leaving my little one—who could do little more than drool and cluster-feed—was heart-wrenching. That door closing represented far more than a mere exit. As I stepped into the elevator, tears streamed down my face, turning my makeup into a watercolor mess.
I genuinely loved my job. Yet, I found myself caught in a tug-of-war between instinct and reason, reminiscent of a devil and angel on my shoulders. I believed that if I “leaned in” a bit more, I could continue advancing my career. I had worked tremendously hard to be the first in my family to graduate from college, and I felt a responsibility to honor the efforts of countless women who fought for working mothers’ rights. I wanted to succeed.
Then came the reality of business travel. Just thinking about it months in advance intensified my guilt. Trips to the West Coast or abroad were particularly tough; FaceTime calls with my baby often occurred during meltdowns—either hers or mine. Touching down in a new city brought a thrill, but it quickly faded as I scrolled through my phone for new photos or messages from my family.
Despite the excitement of big presentations and creative sessions, I began to feel my enthusiasm wane. Midway through a conference call, the babysitter texted pictures of my kids enjoying the park, and a singular question echoed in my mind: “What am I doing?”
Three weeks ago, I made the decision to leave my job. Honestly, I’m unsure if I’ll thrive as a stay-at-home mom. There’s every chance I could find myself longing for my old position in no time. I can’t cook well. I often make multiple trips to the car just to leave the house, and when I do, I lack the patience necessary for this role. I’m also a compulsive shopper and struggle with budgeting.
Do my kids even want me around all day? The truth is, I’m not certain. But I recognize that this is a contentious issue for many mothers, often leading us to choose sides, which is unfair. We all wrestle with guilt, balance, and the pursuit of having it all.
While some women, like Angela, confidently identify as career-driven, others choose to be stay-at-home moms. However, most of us find ourselves in a confusing middle ground—feeling guilty whether we work or not. What we truly need is to support one another and foster healthy conversations around this topic.
Three weeks into my new role, I’m feeling optimistic. I’m reassured that this decision is right for me and my family—for now. This clarity makes even the simplest activities, like crafting a heart-shaped peanut butter and jelly sandwich at the park, that much sweeter.
For more insights on home insemination, check out this excellent resource. Additionally, you might find valuable information on parenting challenges at this site. And if you’re looking into at-home options, consider visiting this page.
Summary:
This article explores the unrealistic portrayal of motherhood through the lens of the character Angela from ‘Who’s the Boss?’. It highlights the struggles of balancing career ambitions with parenting responsibilities, emphasizing the guilt many mothers feel regardless of their choices. The author shares her personal journey of navigating these challenges and ultimately finding comfort in her decision to stay home with her children for the time being.