In my early twenties, a therapist suggested that my ongoing struggles might stem from Attention Deficit Disorder, or ADD. This revelation surprised me, as I’d never considered myself someone who had difficulty focusing on anything.
“I really believe you have ADD. That’s why you find daily tasks so challenging,” she stated, handing me a questionnaire. “Fill this out, and if your score is high enough, your doctor can prescribe Adderall.” She delivered this as if my issues were akin to those of an overactive child on a sugar high.
At home, I took the questionnaire seriously—until I encountered a question that made me pause: “Do you struggle to pay attention to things that bore you?” Isn’t that the very definition of boredom? If tedious tasks were engaging, they wouldn’t be boring. I abandoned the questionnaire, realizing that taking control of my life would yield better results than ADD assessments and medication.
However, for many parents, especially those who stay at home, perhaps Adderall could be a remedy for our myriad challenges. I suspect that many parents share my experience of grappling with the monotonous chores that fill our days. If we accept the premise of the questionnaire I completed years ago, it seems that many of us might be clinically diagnosed with what I refer to as Parenting Attention Deficit Disorder, or PADD. Fingers crossed it gets recognized in the next DSM edition.
I’m not suggesting my attention is always wandering. I can prepare the requisite thirty-two meals and snacks daily, engage in coloring for half an hour, and read stories for much longer. Yet, at some point, I often find myself pondering what adults who aren’t scrubbing mac and cheese off the ceiling are doing, leading me to check Facebook. Or, I’ll skim headlines to assist my oldest with her social studies homework instead of exclaiming, “We have a black president?! Since when?!”
When my PADD prompts me to pursue interesting, non-kid-related activities, I remain alert to my children’s antics. I need to ensure my son doesn’t overwhelm his toddler sister with affection, a behavior reminiscent of Elmyra from Tiny Toons, who would smother her beloved pets. Generally, he’s a great big brother, but at four years old, he’s hardly equipped to take on babysitting duties.
The two of them playing together is not the ideal moment for a PADD episode, as I discovered recently. While my toddler and son played upstairs, I glanced in and saw her with her sister’s dolls while he sat at his desk, back turned. After a quick fix on Twitter, I ventured upstairs only to find he was engaging in a game he dubbed “Cut everything,” a deceptively accurate and terrifying name.
After confiscating the scissors, we cleaned up the vast amount of confetti he had created. The paper had stuck to my toddler’s clothes so stubbornly that I even vacuumed her outfit while she was still wearing it. (Yes, I did share this on Facebook during my next PADD moment.)
I didn’t think much more about the incident until my wife arrived home that evening and inquired about our toddler’s hair. “What happened to her beautiful curls?” she asked, confusion written on her face.
In that brief five minutes of unsupervised play, my son had given his sister an impromptu haircut. Ever the clever little sister, she reported him immediately: when asked if her brother had used scissors on her, she simply nodded and said, “Boy. Hair.” Both he and I were caught red-handed.
I understand my wife’s frustration with my inattentiveness; we’re fortunate it was just a haircut and not something more severe. Since that day, I’ve made an effort to be more vigilant, steering clear of the enticing world of the Internet. Yet, maintaining constant attention is challenging.
However, I doubt PADD is solely a byproduct of our digital era. Parenting has always presented these challenges: as soon as humans began walking upright, some parent likely ignored their child, captivated by the flickering flames in their cave rather than tending to their offspring. I have evidence of this.
When my son’s preschool teacher recounted a similar experience, she said, “Oh yes, that happened to me too. My older daughter cut her little sister’s hair while they were playing under the kitchen table. It was so short it looked like a bad Marine cut.”
“Where were you during all this?” I inquired.
“Just sitting at the table, sipping coffee and reading the newspaper,” she shrugged. So while previous generations may not have been addicted to social media, they certainly experienced PADD just like we do today.
This article was originally published on April 2, 2013. For more insights into parenting, check out our other posts, including one on the home insemination kit to keep engaged. Also, for valuable information on pregnancy, visit the CDC’s website. For a fun holiday treat, don’t miss edible Christmas trees.
Summary
The article discusses the humorous yet relatable struggles of parenting, focusing on the concept of Parenting Attention Deficit Disorder (PADD). Through personal anecdotes, the author highlights the challenges parents face in maintaining focus amid the chaos of daily tasks and the distractions of modern life. It emphasizes that inattentiveness is not a new phenomenon but has existed throughout history.