I’ll admit it—I have a tendency to yell. There’s something oddly gratifying about piercing through the chaos with a loud voice. That brief silence that follows a shout is somewhat heavenly, akin to the glistening vase that holds the funds I’ll eventually pass down to my children’s future therapists. Yet, I truly dislike yelling and aspire to do it less. Thus, my modest New Year’s resolution is to go an entire 24 hours without raising my voice at my kids.
They say that the secret to successfully keeping a New Year’s resolution is to set small, achievable goals. Rather than promising monumental changes, I’m committing to a single day of no yelling. This feels manageable and can serve as a foundation for greater improvements. My aim isn’t to eliminate yelling from my parenting entirely—after all, a well-timed shout can serve a purpose, and let’s be honest, I’m not likely to achieve that.
I don’t yell at my kids every day, but my upbringing featured yelling as the primary mode of communication, and I’ve unconsciously adopted that style. While effective, yelling isn’t pleasant, and it would likely benefit everyone involved if I toned it down. However, avoiding yelling for an entire day poses its own set of challenges.
The Midnight to 6 AM Challenge
Take the hours from midnight to 6 AM—the notorious Wild West of yelling. Once your child reaches a certain age, nightly wake-ups at 2 AM lose their charm. In the beginning, you’re sympathetic to your little one’s nightmares, but after five weeks, you find yourself thinking, “What can I do to convince you that monsters aren’t real? I’d even consider hiring a shaman at this point.” Resisting the urge to bark out a “go to sleep!” at that hour is tough, especially when you feel a rage akin to that powerful scene in the film Unbroken.
The Morning Chaos
Then there’s the morning chaos of getting ready for school, which often devolves into arguments over lost shoes and half-hearted tooth brushing. I might need to adopt a mantra of calmness during this time. While I generally don’t yell when my kids are at school, the moment I pick them up, the real struggle begins. It’s a well-known fact that kids tend to be at their worst on the ride home from school. You’ve missed them enough to feel excited, but that excitement quickly fades when they start bickering the minute they get in the car.
Homework and Dinner Time Trials
Let’s not overlook the trials of homework and dinner time. To avoid yelling during these moments, I try a “natural consequences” approach. Don’t want to do your homework? Fine. You can explain that to your teacher tomorrow. Not interested in dinner? Well, you might just find yourself hungry. I may end up with hungry, uneducated kids, but at least I won’t be yelling at them.
The Bedtime Struggle
And then comes bedtime. It’s a true Jekyll and Hyde experience in parenting. When you’re tucking them in, your heart is full of love and gratitude for being their parent. But the moment you leave the room, they suddenly need another hug, and then water, and before you know it, you’re transformed into an exhausted version of yourself.
In summary, there are plenty of valid reasons to yell at kids throughout the day, but I want to take advantage of those moments less frequently. I’ll need an alternative outlet for my frustration; perhaps taking up knitting for small animals could be an option. For now, I think I’ll just scream into a pillow instead.
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Summary: This article discusses the author’s commitment to refraining from yelling at her children for 24 hours, acknowledging the challenges and frustrations of parenting while exploring healthier communication methods.