In the grand scheme of parenting, slicing a blueberry into quarters might seem trivial, yet it stands out as one of my more unusual choices. Recently, while preparing a snack for my 17-month-old son, I pulled out an organic blueberry from the fridge, recalling a seemingly absurd warning about blueberries being the same size as a toddler’s throat. Ignoring the logic that this idea was far-fetched, I sliced that blueberry in half.
But then a curious thought crossed my mind: what if the half was still too large? After all, my little one has been known to attempt swallowing entire pieces of fruit. So, I quartered the halves. At that moment, laughter erupted from me, and even my son joined in from his highchair, amused by my antics. The pieces were so tiny that his little fingers struggled to grasp them!
To keep my dignity intact, I decided to compile a list of legitimate reasons for quartering a blueberry—ones that have nothing to do with the potential choking hazard posed by a fruit-loving toddler who has been known to stuff a quarter of a banana into his mouth.
- It serves as excellent training for those future peanut butter and jelly sandwiches that require precise quartering.
- All other fruit gets diced up, and we wouldn’t want the blueberry to feel neglected or bullied by the larger melon.
- Cutting it reveals the blueberry’s true color—green on the inside.
- Who knows when you might need to perform “surgery” on a goldfish; blueberries are a perfect practice size.
- You definitely don’t want the dog to choke on a half blueberry tossed aside during a toddler tantrum.
- Some blueberries might contain fortunes (this is true!).
- The Very Hungry Caterpillar could be munching away inside, and I would hate for my son to accidentally bite into him.
- Little gnomes in the pantry might want to claim it as a soccer ball for their cereal box games.
- Blueberry juice has been known to have knife-sharpening properties (absolutely true!).
- Two hands, two feet—do the math!
Feel free to reference this list endlessly, without any royalties due. You’re welcome to indulge in the absurdity.
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In summary, while cutting blueberries may seem trivial, it highlights the amusing and sometimes irrational lengths we go to ensure our children’s safety.