Parenting
A Haiku to Start:
What is going on?
Are you really that lazy?
Yes, I think you are.
My husband, Liam, is truly one of a kind. Over our decade together, I can hardly recall a moment when he raised his voice, let alone engaged in any behavior that would send a sensible woman packing. He is loyal, loving, intelligent, and engaging. Most importantly, he is an incredible father, fully involved and delighted to spend time with our kids. He has a wonderful sense of humor, and I adore his laughter. He wakes up cheerful, bringing positivity to our home. He is dependable and values our marriage and family—these are the qualities I cherish daily.
But then, every morning, I look around and wonder—what on earth is going on here?
Are those the same baby bottles that were in soapy water last night now just sitting in tepid, germ-ridden water? Is that a dirty diaper lying next to the changing table? Didn’t I pick up all these toys yesterday, the ones scattered across the floor? Is the TV still blaring? Did the cat really decide to use my closet as a litter box because you didn’t clean it like I asked last night? Those pants on the bathroom floor—really? You took them off and stepped right over them on your way out, leaving the cleanup for “someone else”?
And that shirt, just a foot away from the laundry basket? Seriously? I appreciate that you maintain good hygiene, but what kind of water ritual do you perform every morning that leaves the mirror and floors drenched? You definitely pulled out your toothbrush and toothpaste this morning—I know because I put them back every day. Do you think they magically return to their holders after you’re done, along with the toothpaste cap and your aftershave?
Oh, and let’s not forget the wet towel that ends up on my side of the bed.
But hey, when you come home to take over with the kids while I retreat to my office, I know there’s chocolate waiting for me—the chocolate you gifted me for Mother’s Day. Did you really eat my Mother’s Day chocolate? Right off my desk?
Let’s address the fridge situation. One does not simply leave an empty juice jug inside the refrigerator. Leaving one teaspoon of salsa and saying, “I saved you some” isn’t saving; it’s just being rude. Just eat the whole jar next time, alright? And pesto is not just “dip.” If I don’t finish my dinner at a restaurant, it doesn’t magically become your midnight snack. Oh, and baby food? That’s for babies, not for you. Baby cookies are ridiculously overpriced—not meant for you, sir. I like to eat too, especially my Mother’s Day chocolate.
Some basic household responsibilities seem to be overlooked, such as:
- Trash: It goes in the trash can. If you manage that, trash cans get emptied. It’s not a contest to see how much you can cram in there. Just change it. And when you do, that means putting a new bag in and taking the full one all the way to the garage. You know, where the large bin is for recycling? That’s where boxes should go, not piled up beside the door in the garage for weeks.
- Cups: I use them too. Why do we have to be down to one cup before you decide to bring in a dozen cups with rotted coffee at the bottom that you’ve been collecting in your truck? Seriously, get it together.
- Your truck: It is not a trash can. When we need to use it, I shouldn’t have to spend 15 minutes cleaning it just to find a spot to sit. What is that smell, by the way? I drive two kids around and my car has never smelled like that.
- Your dresser: It’s supposed to be for folded clothes. I wash, dry, and fold them—so why does it look like a tornado went through? You needed the shorts at the bottom, fine, but the rest didn’t deserve that chaos.
If you’re “helping” by putting away clothes, please don’t take my socks. And how do my underwear end up in our daughter’s drawer? They’re not that small!
The washing machine? It can handle a lot, but it’s not meant to hold four loads at once. Please, separate them.
Also, a “project” is supposed to be finished, especially when it involves a new expensive power tool. That power tool shouldn’t be left on the patio table in the rain. And we wouldn’t need to buy another one if the previous one wasn’t lost in that chaotic garage you’re responsible for—along with the trash and the litter box.
I could go on, but I’m exhausted. Just because I stayed up a bit later than usual doesn’t mean you should let our four-year-old stay up too. Please, put her to bed. That’s all. Good night.
For more tips and discussions on family life, you might enjoy checking out this at-home insemination kit post. Also, for meal planning strategies, this resource might be helpful. And if you want to learn more about fertility options, this Wikipedia entry is an excellent resource.
Summary:
In this humorous yet poignant letter, Maya expresses her frustration with her husband Liam’s messy habits while acknowledging his many positive qualities. From the chaos in their home to the fridge mishaps and laundry dilemmas, Maya highlights the contrast between Liam’s loving nature and his disregard for household responsibilities. Ultimately, she calls for more collaboration and respect for shared spaces, all while maintaining a light-hearted tone.