There Are No Such Things as ‘Just Words’

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“Everyone, please calm down. It was just words.” I’ve encountered this phrase countless times, especially in the aftermath of a video featuring a political candidate boasting about kissing women without consent and “grabbing them by the private parts” simply because of his fame. They were just words, right?

While it’s true that they were “just words,” this perspective diminishes their significance if you underestimate the power of language. The reality is, words hold immense power. They matter—immensely.

The old adage, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me,” has been a childhood retort against verbal bullies for generations. However, extensive research, along with the experiences of those who have faced bullying, have proven this saying to be false. Verbal abuse, whether from peers or online, can alter brain chemistry similarly to physical abuse. The emotional turmoil inflicted by verbal bullying is so profound that it has driven some young individuals to tragically take their own lives in an effort to escape the pain.

What is Verbal Bullying?

So, what is verbal bullying? Just words, some might say.

But it’s not merely peers who can inflict harm with their words. A report from Harvard University reveals that verbal abuse from parents can be just as damaging as physical or sexual abuse within the household. Let me emphasize that: hurtful words directed at a child can result in emotional and psychological harm equivalent to physical injury. In fact, the effects of verbal abuse can surpass those of witnessing domestic violence or experiencing sexual abuse outside the home. What is this verbal abuse? Just words.

The Power of Words

Have you ever read a book that profoundly changed your perspective? A book that brought you to tears? Or one that terrified you? (Thanks for that, Jonathan Swift.) Books are composed of words, yet they have the capacity to transport us to different realms, invoke deep emotions, enhance our understanding of complex ideas, and shape our beliefs.

Recall Martin Luther King Jr.’s iconic “I Have a Dream” speech. It holds a pivotal place in American history, stirring national sentiments and fostering a commitment to racial equality. Many can recite portions of that speech: “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.” What is a speech? Just words, one might argue.

Consider the speeches delivered by historical figures like Adolf Hitler. He was a master orator, capable of rallying a nation around pride while simultaneously fostering fear and prejudice against marginalized groups. His propaganda machine manipulated many into overlooking government-sponsored atrocities. Remarkably, Hitler never physically harmed anyone himself—yet he bears the weight of the Holocaust’s horrors. Why? Because of the influence of his words. Just words.

Words Carry Weight

Words carry weight. They can heal or harm, inspire or incite. They possess the potential to change lives for better or worse, to ignite conflicts, or to spark revolutions. Words mold our understanding of reality, both as individuals and as a collective society.

So, don’t tell me that words lack significance. Don’t suggest that boasting about one’s ability to assault women doesn’t contribute to a culture of rape and objectification. Don’t imply that trivializing attempts to seduce a married woman should not inform my judgment of one’s character. Do not dismiss a recorded glimpse into someone’s true nature as merely “just words.”

There’s no such thing as “just” words. There are only words—words imbued with meaning, influence, and power. Words that matter.

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In summary, words are never insignificant; they shape our perceptions, influence our actions, and have the potential to create lasting impacts.