Updated: Aug. 21, 2015
Originally Published: June 21, 2011
“Once Leo turns three, he’ll start talking just like Emma,” my son Sam declared confidently, his small voice filled with certainty.
I paused for a moment, contemplating whether to let that statement slide since Leo, who doesn’t have any known disabilities, is likely to begin talking well before his third birthday. However, addressing the fact that he would likely be conversing well before then, while Emma might not, would mean discussing the reason behind that difference: Down syndrome.
I chuckled at my initial hesitation. After all, conversations about disability are a regular part of our family dynamics. Given that I’m hearing impaired, discussions about various disabilities, such as the absence of limbs, are not unusual. Yet, it feels different when I’m speaking about Emma, Sam’s little sister.
Taking a deep breath, I turned to Sam and said, “You know, Leo will probably start talking before he hits three. In fact, he might even be chatting away at two or even one.” Sam nodded, trying to convey that he understood, though I knew he was a bit lost. I continued, “Emma has Down syndrome, sweetheart.” His eyes lit up as he recognized the name, “Oh, just like my buddy Max!”
I replied, “Exactly! Emma has Down syndrome just like Max. This means they both have an extra chromosome, a little piece of genetic information that can impact how they learn and grow.”
“My friend Max can talk,” Sam interjected. “Yes, he can, and just because both he and Emma have Down syndrome doesn’t mean they are the same. He is Max, and she is Emma. Think about you and your friends who are all four years old. You might all be boys, but you have different interests, right? You love playing pirates and talking about space adventures, while others might not. It’s similar for Emma and Max—they share a condition, but they are unique individuals.”
While he nodded, I could sense his attention drifting after I mentioned pirates. Sure enough, he soon began enthusiastically discussing a girl from preschool who shares his interest in space stories. That’s my boy!
I allowed the conversation to flow naturally, glad that we were discussing Down syndrome openly. I appreciate that we are not shying away from exploring these differences but rather embracing them.
My advice is straightforward: be open about disability, particularly when it’s part of your family. Instead of waiting for a significant moment to bring it up, integrate discussions about disability into everyday conversations. Kids are incredibly perceptive—like little antennae picking up on nuances. They can sense when you’re not being truthful or are avoiding the subject. So, be honest, even if it’s in bite-sized, kid-friendly pieces.
Key Points to Remember:
- Down syndrome is simple to explain: it’s an extra chromosome.
- Each person’s experience with Down syndrome is unique; it’s not a one-size-fits-all situation.
- It may influence how someone with Down syndrome learns and develops.
- Remember, Down syndrome should not be seen as a tragedy. If you view it sadly, your child will likely sense that.
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Summary:
This article explores how to discuss Down syndrome with children in a straightforward, approachable manner. It emphasizes the importance of open dialogue about disabilities and encourages parents to weave these conversations naturally into everyday life. By doing so, children can develop a better understanding of unique differences and foster acceptance.