Birthday Mischief: A Day of Delightful Annoyances

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It’s nearly my birthday, and I’m ready to indulge in some delightful mischief! Tomorrow marks the day I treat myself to a series of activities that, while perfectly natural to me, will surely drive my partner, Jake, up the wall. As a special gift from him, he won’t be allowed to complain or give me any eye-rolls throughout the day. Here’s my agenda (which I will, of course, have the right to expand upon at any moment):

My Mischievous Agenda

  • Leave all my bathroom cabinets and dresser drawers wide open, while ensuring at least three pairs of flip-flops are artfully scattered around the house.
  • Call Jake at his office, then on his cell, and back to his office phone just to inquire about dinner. Who cares if he’s in a meeting? This is crucial!
  • Send him a list of annoyingly trivial tasks to do, followed by a cheerful smiley and a few hugs and kisses.
  • Head out for dinner, blasting the AC the entire ride to dry my hair, which curls much better that way compared to using a diffuser. I might need to leave a bit earlier for extra travel time.
  • Spend no less than 15 minutes at the restaurant deliberating over the menu, ultimately concocting a brand-new dish by merging three different options.
  • Treat the hostess stand like a treasure trove, stuffing my bag with free toothpicks, matchboxes, and mints. Why not? They’re complimentary!
  • Catch a movie, but only after making a detour to the Dollar Store for snacks, since I refuse to pay exorbitant prices at the theater.
  • Enjoy the film while munching on my bag of Sour Patch Kids, which come in a crinkly bag rather than the overpriced theater boxes.
  • Venture to Walmart at 11 PM for a long-overdue shopping spree, picking up 20 items I’ve needed for ages, from fans to nail files. I’ll compare prices closely and present coupons at checkout, paying with the coins that have been weighing down my bag.
  • Sleep with my feet slathered in Vaseline, wrapped in plastic, and cozy in wool socks. Does it actually make my feet as soft as a baby’s bottom? Probably not, but it’s a fun experiment.
  • Toss and turn all night, hogging all the blankets and pillows.

It sounds like a perfect day to me!

Related Resources

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Summary: The upcoming birthday brings a day of playful annoyances for Jake, including open cabinets, quirky dinner inquiries, and a shopping spree at Walmart. It’s a light-hearted take on celebrating individuality in a partnership.