Yesterday morning, I made an unexpected decision: I brought all four of my kids along to my psychiatrist appointment. Traditionally, I reserve this time—much like my OB checkups during pregnancy—to focus entirely on my well-being without the distractions of parenting. It’s a precious moment in my busy schedule when I can be taken care of, free from the worry of keeping my children quiet in a formal setting.
To be frank, I also dreaded the thought of explaining my visit to the psychiatrist to my kids. Questions like, “Will I have to come here too, Mommy?” or “Why do you keep coming here if you’re feeling fine?” were ones I wanted to avoid, as they stirred feelings of shame within me. Yes, shame—despite being an advocate for those with Bipolar Disorder and actively working to destigmatize mental illness. I’ve openly shared my journey in interviews and co-edited a bestselling anthology on mental health, yet I still felt afraid. I feared my children would see me as permanently flawed, knowing I would likely need these appointments for life. Although I embrace the medication that helps me, it still leaves me feeling, in some ways, like a failure for needing it.
This week, I realized my reluctance to take my kids along stemmed not only from the inconvenience but also from a desire to shield them from the less comfortable aspects of my mental health journey, even though we’ve discussed my condition openly. When childcare options fell through due to scheduling conflicts and my kids took their time getting ready, I faced a choice: cancel the appointment or bring them along.
As with many things in life, especially when living with mental illness, perspective is key. The hefty $110 cancellation fee certainly influenced my decision, but it wasn’t the sole reason. I came to understand that to genuinely combat the stigma surrounding mental illness, I needed to demonstrate this aspect of managing my disorder to my children. This experience would not only normalize the idea of seeking help for them if needed, but it would also show them that even seemingly ordinary people visit mental health professionals for support.
My sons opened doors for others in the waiting area and engaged in polite conversation, just as they would in any other doctor’s office—perhaps a Southern charm at play! It’s vital to counteract the damaging stereotypes that often surround mental illness. Not everyone struggling is the stereotypical image depicted in pop culture; we need to normalize mental health care, particularly for the next generation.
During my appointment, my children accompanied me to the nurse’s station for my weight check and to discuss my symptoms and medication. They chimed in at times when the nurse asked about my sleep patterns and irritability—talk about some honest reflections! They even joined me in the doctor’s office, happily commenting on the comfortable chairs and engaging with the doctor and nurse, giving hugs upon our departure.
I want my children to understand that anyone they encounter seeking mental health support is bravely addressing their challenges. Part of dismantling stigma involves revealing the humanity of those who suffer, and this was my subtle way of doing just that.
I also considered how my children’s presence might impact other patients in the office. Their cheerful demeanor seemed to lighten the atmosphere, which often feels clinical and tense. I made sure they were well-mannered and kept noise to a minimum, but I didn’t stifle their natural spontaneity. Many people anxiously wait in their cars before entering mental health facilities, trying to avoid being seen. In contrast, when visiting other medical offices, patients don’t hide away in shame for receiving treatment. By fostering open conversations about mental health, we can create an environment where seeking help is as normal as going to a doctor for physical ailments.
I sincerely hope that if you are navigating mental illness, you will feel empowered to have honest discussions with your loved ones about your journey. Not only does this foster understanding, but it also encourages them to seek help if needed and support others who are doing the same. For more insights on navigating personal journeys, check out this post about artificial insemination kits. Also, for authoritative information on prenatal care, visit this resource. And for week-by-week guidance during pregnancy, you can refer to this excellent resource.
In summary, taking my kids to my psychiatrist appointment turned out to be a transformative experience. It not only helped demystify mental health care for them, but it also contributed to breaking down stigma in a small yet significant way.