As I’ve spent considerable time observing children, I’ve come to realize that adults often exhibit behaviors strikingly similar to those of kids—just in taller forms. While some studies, like those from Buzzfeed, suggest that children resemble miniature inebriated individuals, my observations propose that it’s the other way around.
1. The Toy Dilemma
Kid scenario: Child A plays with a toy until something more interesting comes along. Child B picks up the same toy, prompting Child A to demand it back. Cue the chaos.
Adult scenario: Jane dates Mark for a while but loses interest. When Susan becomes interested in Mark, Jane suddenly wants him back, exclaiming, “That’s my man!” Classic behavior, right?
2. The Crying Cascade
Kid scenario: One child starts crying, leading a chain reaction of sobbing among others. They have no idea why they’re upset—pure madness.
Adult scenario: Any viral Internet meme fits here. Someone posts a photo of a dress, and suddenly everyone feels compelled to share their own version, simply to fit in.
3. The Whining Wars
Kid scenario: Child A whines for a toy, and Child B retaliates with louder whines. Nothing gets resolved.
Adult scenario: Think of Congress—no further explanation needed.
4. Attention Seekers
Kid scenario: One child performs a silly dance while another sings loudly. It’s all about getting attention, and it can be exhausting.
Adult scenario: Reality TV shows like The Kardashians thrive on this need for attention. They just keep coming!
5. Yelling and Acceptable Behavior
Kid scenario: A child yells out of frustration, which is deemed unacceptable.
Adult scenario: You yell in frustration, and it’s justified—because you’re the adult.
6. Conflict Resolution
Kid scenario: Child A pinches Child B in a dispute, leading to a physical altercation.
Adult scenario: Men squabble over trivial matters, from sports to sandwiches, showcasing similar primal instincts.
7. Name-Calling
Kid scenario: “You’re a butt-face!” transforms into “You’re a poop-head!” Children excel at name-calling.
Adult scenario: Women have simply mastered the art of whispering their critiques. “Did you see her outfit? What was she thinking?”
8. Manipulation Masters
Kid scenario: A child coerces a grandparent into buying a desired toy, employing every trick in the book.
Adult scenario: Just put Congress down for this one, too. They’re experts at manipulation.
9. The Laziness Factor
Kid scenario: After being told to clean up, kids play instead—classic procrastination.
Adult scenario: Retail workers slack off when the manager is out—because, well, retail.
10. Impulse Control Issues
Kid scenario: A child is offered two cupcakes for waiting, but eats one immediately, lacking any self-restraint.
Adult scenario: Me on a diet, “Hand over that cupcake, now!” Impulse control? What’s that?
Conclusion
Despite numerous examples that could be cited, the reality is that adults are merely taller versions of children, with slightly better fine motor skills and a broader vocabulary—most of the time. Our ability to manage emotions is superficial, easily disrupted when our basic needs aren’t met. So, what can we glean from this? Perhaps we should cut our kids some slack.
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Summary
Adults often display behaviors akin to those of children, despite being taller. From crying cascades to impulsive decisions, the similarities are striking and reflect a shared human experience of emotional management.