Parenting Insights Inspired by Johnny Cash

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One of my all-time favorite songs tells the story of a boy whose tough upbringing stems from an unusual decision made by his father: naming him Sue. The song, “A Boy Named Sue,” penned by Shel Silverstein and famously performed by the legendary Johnny Cash, captures the struggles and resilience of a boy grappling with his unique name.

The lyrics convey Sue’s challenges as he navigates life, taking hits both literally and figuratively. His journey is marked by embarrassment and confrontation, leading to a climactic reunion with his estranged father in a bar. The confrontation is intense, but it culminates in a moment of understanding as Sue learns why his father chose such a burdensome name. His dad explains:

“Son, this world is rough
And if a man’s gonna make it, he’s gotta be tough
And I knew I wouldn’t be there to help ya along.
So I give ya that name and I said goodbye
I knew you’d have to get tough or die
And it’s the name that helped to make you strong.”

With this new perspective, Sue finds a way to forgive his father. Whenever he faces life’s challenges, he reflects on that tough love.

As a longtime Johnny Cash admirer, this song resonates with me today, especially as my son, Jake, embarks on his own journey in kindergarten. (Rest assured, I’m not abandoning my family, so please save the vitriol.)

Growing up as a devoted New York Giants fan in North Jersey, I’ve endured countless disappointing seasons while also celebrating championship victories. However, over the past decade and a half, I’ve found myself residing in Philadelphia—home turf for the Eagles. This city often gets a bad rap, particularly when it comes to sports. For instance, the infamous incident where Eagles fans booed Santa Claus continues to be a hot topic. Wearing my Giants gear here does elicit some colorful remarks, but as a grown man, I’ve learned to take it in stride.

Yet, my concern lies with Jake. At just six years old, he’s beginning to grasp the intricacies of football and eagerly asks questions as we watch games together. I cherish these moments, but I wrestle with the dilemma of whether to encourage him to cheer for the Giants, potentially setting him up for ridicule among his Eagles-supporting peers. It pains me to think that something as trivial as a football team could create social friction for him.

On the flip side, like Sue’s father believed, am I not also preparing him for a world that can be tough and unforgiving? These thoughts will undoubtedly intensify as the Giants and Eagles face off later this month, generating plenty of chatter on the playground.

However, I suspect my worries might be unfounded. In true six-year-old fashion, Jake will likely choose his favorite team regardless of my influence. And truthfully, that’s probably for the best. Just as long as he steers clear of the Dallas Cowboys—then we’ll have a serious issue.

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In summary, parenting often involves navigating tough decisions and preparing our children for the challenges of life. Like Sue, sometimes a little tough love can build character, even if it comes from an unexpected source.