When my first child arrived, I relished dressing her in cute outfits and accessories. Fast forward to now, and my primary concern is simply ensuring my kids are in clean clothes! Transitioning from one child to two was a significant adjustment, particularly regarding daily routines. However, moving from two to three has dramatically reshaped my parenting style.
The main factor? I simply lack the time and energy I once had. (So. Many. Kids.) Occasionally, I feel a twinge of guilt about not being able to shower each child with undivided attention every day. Yet, the more relaxed approach I’ve adopted with my third—and final—child has been incredibly liberating. Here are eight ways the arrival of my new baby has changed my parenting approach:
- I allow my older two kids to resolve their disputes more often. My 6-year-old daughter and 4-year-old son adore each other but also have those classic sibling spats. Before their baby sister arrived, I would often step in to mediate with phrases like, “Let’s hear both sides,” or when I was feeling less patient, “Just cut it out!” Now, I mostly take a step back when they start bickering, usually because I’m busy managing the chaos of three kids.
- I’ve become more relaxed about milestones. I used to fret over every little developmental milestone for my first two, but with my third, I’ve learned to just let things unfold naturally.
- I’ve embraced messiness in the house. With limited time, I’ve realized that it’s okay if the toys are scattered everywhere or if dinner is a bit chaotic.
- I prioritize quality time over quantity. Instead of trying to carve out lengthy periods for each child, I focus on making the moments we do have together count.
- I’ve learned to delegate. My older kids often help with small tasks, whether it’s setting the table or entertaining their little sister, which also fosters their independence.
- I’ve become more patient. The sheer number of kids has taught me to breathe and let things go.
- I’ve stopped obsessing over schedules. While I still strive for some routine, I’m more adaptable and willing to roll with the punches.
- I’ve found joy in the chaos. There’s something wonderfully chaotic about having three kids, and I’m learning to embrace it instead of fighting against it.
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In summary, having my third child has profoundly impacted my parenting style, leading me to become more relaxed and adaptable while still cherishing the moments I spend with my kids.