I chose the path of single motherhood, but I never anticipated how much I would rely on others for support.
In 2019, I welcomed my son on Good Friday. Coming from a large Catholic family and someone who believes in signs, I viewed his birth date as a good omen. It wasn’t magical in the traditional sense; rather, it was more of a practical sign that said, “This baby is measuring bigger than expected. Let’s plan a C-section. What day works for you?”
After two years of trying to conceive as a single mother by choice (SMBC) and enduring seven unsuccessful intrauterine insemination (IUI) attempts and two failed in vitro fertilization (IVF) cycles, I was ready to prioritize safety over a perfect birth plan. I just wanted to hold my little miracle, who was already causing me heartburn.
That spring, my best friend Emma held my hand while a surgeon who looked remarkably like my younger brother delivered my son, Max. He arrived, perfect and pink, though he had a rash that sent me into a panic. The nurses reassured me it was normal, but “normal” was the last thing on my mind as everything felt overwhelming and surreal.
Thanks to my surgery recovery, my mother flew in from Florida to support Max and me. After a cozy three-day hospital stay filled with visitors and well-meaning flowers, it was time to head home.
Once home, I tried to establish a routine. I settled down on the couch to nurse Max, fumbling awkwardly to get him latched on as I adjusted to this new role. The experience was both beautiful and chaotic, and I realized I would need help more than I had anticipated.
Resources for Single Mothers
To aid those on a similar journey, there are excellent resources available online. For example, the At Home Insemination products can be incredibly helpful. Additionally, Kindbody offers valuable insights into pregnancy and home insemination, while A Little Boost for Expecting Moms provides further support for new mothers.
In summary, navigating the 4th trimester as a single mom brought unexpected challenges and much-needed support from my family and friends. It’s a journey filled with love, growth, and learning to embrace help when it’s offered.