Menu Connection
Forget family dinners; I’ve become a family breakfast enthusiast. While experts frequently highlight the advantages of family dinners, the reality can often be a logistical challenge. We’re trying something new. By Taylor Jameson
Last week, my partner’s birthday happened to fall on the day of a much-anticipated school carnival. Three of our kids were busy face-painting, bouncing around, and devouring pizza, while another was off at a friend’s bowling party. By the time we all came together in the kitchen—definitely in need of baths and way past dinner time—it was time for a birthday celebration. Although we couldn’t pull off our usual “fancy dinner,” where the kids set the table meticulously, we gathered around the kitchen island. The older kids perched on stools, and the youngest was plopped right on the counter. We sang loudly over an apple pie adorned with 39 candles (my partner isn’t a fan of cake, but that’s a topic for another day). Amid the cheers and smoke from the candles, I looked around and soaked in the moment. Even if family dinner means having apple pie well past bedtime, it still serves its purpose.
The benefits of family dinners are numerous: enhanced communication, better manners, healthier eating, and shared responsibilities. Research has shown that family meals positively impact young people, leading to better grades and reduced depression. At the core of it all is connection. Sometimes, with play practices, hockey games, and music recitals, that connection may not happen over a pot roast at 6:30 PM. I cherish every family dinner I can snag, eager to hear about the day’s ups and downs (or as we jokingly call them, “popsicles” and “poopsicles”). But when dinners aren’t feasible, I’ll happily settle for breakfast, lunch, snacks, or dessert because what matters most is togetherness. As Walt Whitman beautifully put it, “We were together; I forget the rest.”
Dinner might be the pinnacle family meal—especially since no one is rushing off to work or school—but family breakfast shouldn’t be overlooked. For starters, there’s typically less contention over strawberries and French toast than over broccoli and salmon (and who can blame the kids?). While breakfast doesn’t allow for a full day of reflection, it does set the stage for the day ahead. What are you most looking forward to today? What has you feeling anxious? How can we support each other in tackling challenges? Sharing breakfast with family offers a meaningful alternative, preserving the ritual of togetherness.
Growing up, we had our designated seats at the dining table, specific chores (like sweeping, washing dishes, or pouring milk), and we gathered for dinner at least five nights a week. My brother had to wear a shirt, and cloth napkins were a must. I remember even having a bread plate! Once my siblings headed off to college and it was just me with my parents, I often lamented family dinners. But my parents persisted, and I’m grateful they did. Although I can’t cook like my mom, and my family now often opts for frozen nuggets instead of filet mignon, I understand the importance of sharing meals. Nowadays, with the same challenges facing my soon-to-be teenage kids, plus some frightening new issues, I will keep family dinners in my toolkit (they’re proven to counteract the effects of cyberbullying, for instance).
So how essential are family dinners? The answer is very important. But I also wonder, can we embrace family breakfast as an alternative? I believe the answer is yes. As long as we’re together, free from distractions, eating, sharing, and connecting, it doesn’t matter the time of day—be it morning or evening. Last week, while my family enjoyed apple pie around the kitchen island, we may not have looked like a Norman Rockwell painting, with one child still sporting zombie skeleton face paint. But honestly, that’s the kind of memory I’d prefer to frame.
Taylor Jameson lives in Raleigh, North Carolina, where she writes and raises her children. Her work has been featured in various publications, including Flying South, Walter Magazine, Architectural Digest, and Food 52. Aside from family, her passions include South Carolina beaches, a Roger Federer backhand, a serene Charlottesville lawn, and—most importantly—a captivating story.
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In summary, while family dinners are highly valuable, family breakfasts offer a compelling alternative for connection, engagement, and sharing moments together. Embracing breakfast as a family ritual can foster the same sense of togetherness, ensuring that despite busy schedules, families can still bond over shared meals.