Can you do self-insemination at home ?
As a young widow navigating life after the loss of my husband due to COVID-19, I cannot tolerate the dismissive notion that “kids are not impacted by COVID.” Over the past year, I’ve witnessed my three-year-old daughter, Mia, grapple with the heartbreaking reality that her dad will never return home.
I’ve had to explain repeatedly that her father went to the hospital to get better, but unfortunately, he was too ill. I’ve told her that because his heart stopped beating, he is now in heaven, watching over us, and while we can’t see him, he will always reside in our hearts. I’ve watched her turn away from her favorite foods, and I’ve seen that distant look in her eyes, a clear indication that she is yearning for her dad.
For months, I’ve observed her wait by the front door as she used to, expecting her father to walk in and scoop her into his arms. Every morning and night, she runs to our bedroom, hoping to find him there, only to be met with the painful reality. The questions come incessantly: “Where is Dad?” and “When will he be home?” I’ve listened to her express her love and longing for him, wishing for one of his hugs. It breaks my heart to see her struggle, and there are moments when I feel utterly powerless to ease her pain.
Each night, Mia kisses a picture of her dad before bed, whispering, “Goodnight, Dad in heaven, I love you.” She carries that photo around the house, hugging the frame tightly, wishing he was with us for a real embrace. She delights in watching videos of him singing “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star” with her, wanting to replay those moments repeatedly. She often reminisces about her last birthday and the special cake they made together. I’ve seen her reach for the sky, saying, “I can’t reach Dad; he’s too high up in the clouds.”
On top of all this, I also have a 17-month-old son, Jake, who was just a baby when his father fell ill. He won’t have memories of his dad and will rely on photos, a few videos, and the stories we share as he grows. Just thinking about that reality is heartbreaking. I’ve watched him grow into an energetic little toddler who brings joy to our lives, but I can’t help but worry about how the absence of his father will affect him as he matures and realizes what he’s lost.
Mia has made significant progress over the past year, but COVID has irrevocably altered her life, as it has for approximately 40,000 other children who have lost a parent to this virus. To claim that children aren’t affected is to ignore the profound impact of grief on young lives. Through my involvement with the Young Widows and Widowers of COVID-19 support group, I’ve connected with other parents facing similar struggles. Each story shared amplifies the pain not just for my children, but for countless others navigating their own losses.
This is our reality: we are not just mourning our loved ones; we are also helping our children cope with their grief. It’s a complex and overwhelming experience. Together with my fellow widows and widowers, I’ve witnessed how COVID has transformed our children’s lives. Our kids are the youngest victims of this pandemic, and their futures will be shaped by the absence of a mother or father. So before you say that kids are not affected by COVID, remember the countless little ones whose lives will never be the same because they lost a parent to this virus.
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If you’re interested in learning more, here are some related queries: How to support children grieving a parent, Coping with loss during COVID-19, Understanding childhood grief, Resources for young widows and widowers, and Supporting toddlers through grief.
In summary, the impact of COVID-19 on children, particularly those who have lost a parent, is profound and enduring. It’s essential to acknowledge their grief and provide the support they need as they navigate life without their loved ones.