I live with disabilities—multiple ones, in fact—but my bipolar II disorder is the most challenging, often exacerbating other conditions. These disabilities are largely invisible. To manage them, I rely on a variety of medications, but even they have limitations. Anxiety often overwhelms me, making simple tasks seem insurmountable. A full eight-hour workday outside the home is beyond my capability. In today’s late-stage capitalist society, if you can’t manage at least that, your worth is often dismissed. You’re labeled a burden, a drain on resources.
Society imposes a harsh expectation: everyone must contribute in some form. A recent NBC poll revealed that 84% of Americans feel that unemployment is shameful. While I am not unemployed—I have a full-time career as a writer—my inability to work outside the home or adhere to a traditional schedule leads many to view my career as merely a hobby. Sometimes I write at odd hours, like 2 a.m., which further complicates perceptions of my work.
The Pain of Being Undervalued
Living with a disability is difficult enough. Many of us with mental health issues have learned acceptance over time, recognizing that there are limits to what we can do, and that realization can be painful. High-pressure situations and the typical demands of a workday can be overwhelming. I often spiral into anxiety when faced with expectations—will I meet them? What if I fail?
Fortunately, I can write and work from home at my own pace. I’m also a dedicated parent; we homeschool our children. However, this kind of work is often undervalued in our society. A report in England’s The Times noted that even writers are seen as less than, and my peers often regard my writing as a charming pastime rather than a legitimate profession. Former professors who once envisioned me achieving tenure now see me as a brilliant failure—“too bad she was crazy,” they seem to think.
But I refuse to accept that label. My life has meaning and value, and although I may have had to adjust my dreams, that does not equate to a total loss.
The Struggle Against Dismissal
In a world that equates worth with productivity, if you can’t manage a full-time job, you’re often deemed weak. Those who have worked traditional hours may feel entitled to view their labor as more valuable than mine. Yes, I earn money from writing, but I also engage in unpaid work as a parent. I don’t sit idle; I manage a household, educate my children, and even volunteer.
Yet, society often tells me I don’t contribute enough. Even other mothers, who understand my struggles, sometimes give me skeptical looks when my husband has to step in because I’m having a tough day—not due to physical illness, but mental health challenges. This perception unfairly labels me as lazy or inadequate.
Embracing My Intrinsic Worth
When the world constantly sends the message that you’re worthless, it’s easy to start believing it. I sometimes think my family would be better off without me because I can’t work a traditional job. Society seems to value those who can be productive, and I often find myself justifying my existence by insisting that I am indeed productive, even if it doesn’t fit the conventional mold.
But here’s the truth: I don’t need to justify my worth. Simply being a human being on this planet means I have value, and I deserve respect, dignity, food, shelter, and care. I shouldn’t be measured by capitalist standards that prioritize financial success above all else. If my value is contingent on working a 9-to-5 job, then what about the elderly? Should we ignore them? What about infants? Should we dismiss their needs? Or should we, instead, recognize that everyone, regardless of their productivity, deserves to live with dignity and joy?
It’s a challenge to maintain this mindset when society tries to convince you that you don’t matter. It’s hard, especially when I reach a breaking point—when anxiety takes over, when I feel utterly exhausted. But needing rest doesn’t diminish my value; it simply reflects my human experience.
I may have invisible disabilities, but I have worth. My ability to financially contribute to my family doesn’t define my value.
For more insights into the challenges of parenthood and anxiety, check out this resource on parenthood anxiety. If you’re interested in learning more about pregnancy and home insemination, this link offers excellent information.
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Summary
Living with disabilities, particularly mental health challenges, can lead to feelings of worthlessness in a society that equates productivity with value. Despite these challenges, it’s important to recognize intrinsic worth that exists beyond financial contributions. Everyone deserves dignity, respect, and a meaningful life, regardless of their ability to conform to traditional work standards.