Not that it’s anyone’s business, but my partner and I often find ourselves wandering around our home in the nude in front of our kids. But no need to fret — it’s just a typical level of nudity. It wasn’t something we planned; it just kind of evolved, and we didn’t mind our four children seeing us in our middle-aged state.
In our household, it’s perfectly normal to leave the bathroom door ajar or dash around without clothes on — whether it’s post-shower or just because it’s Tuesday. We don’t greet the mailman in our birthday suits or use the restroom openly when we have guests (ah, the days before COVID when we could entertain).
We’re not uncouth or indecent; we’re simply a bit lazy — though I’d prefer you call us efficient. With so many kids who seem to think that my bathroom breaks are the perfect opportunity to negotiate for candy or extra screen time (or, back when they were toddlers, a snack), leaving the door open just makes things easier for everyone.
I’ll admit, my partner and I were already accustomed to an open-door policy long before the kids arrived. In fact, I think we left the bathroom door open early in our relationship, which likely extinguished any romance we might have had. No mystery here!
Honestly, we feel comfortable showering and changing in front of our children because we believe there’s no shame in our bodies. While we’re not calling family meetings mid-shower, if our kids burst in begging for a popsicle for breakfast, they’re going to see us naked.
We want our kids to understand that bodies are just bodies. While they can be sexual, being naked isn’t anything to make a fuss about. Bodies shouldn’t be hypersexualized; they are for living and experiencing life. After all, we are physical beings.
Plus, it’s good to burst any illusions about perfect bodies before they get too caught up in societal standards. Isn’t it a kindness to prepare them for the realities of aging? They’ll thank us later.
By being nonchalant about our nudity, we normalize bodies and their functions. My children have witnessed my body endure the various changes of pregnancy, breastfeeding, and everyday life. This familiarity encourages them to ask questions about anatomy — everything from breasts to butts. In fact, they’re quite comfortable with these discussions. Perhaps too comfortable, as demonstrated during Thanksgiving dinner in front of my mom.
Some of our most significant conversations about bodily autonomy and consent have taken place while I was naked. My kids have shown a genuine curiosity about breasts, sometimes asking to touch or examine them (a work-in-progress lesson on consent). They’ve seen milk flow from my nipples and even tried to assist me in expressing breast milk! They love poking my squishy stomach and playfully making faces at my wrinkled belly, often bursting into laughter while jiggling my belly fat.
All of my kids have seen me use menstrual cups — my youngest has even crawled in to see how it works. When my oldest declared it gross, I reminded him he walked into my bathroom uninvited and that he should keep his opinions to himself. It was a teachable moment about menstruation being a completely normal bodily function.
While I’m relaxed about nudity, my partner and I have different boundaries. He has certain limits that he communicates to our kids, while I tend to be more laid-back. After all, once you’ve had a multitude of medical professionals in your birthing room while you were fully exposed (four times!), what’s a little nudity among family?
Will our openness continue as the kids grow and reach puberty? That’ll be up to them. Once they express discomfort, we’ll certainly respect their boundaries. Personally, I can’t envision a teenager or adult wanting to see their parents without clothes, so perhaps by then, I’ll finally be able to enjoy some privacy in the bathroom.
For further insights on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this blog post, as well as information from Intracervical Insemination, an authority on the subject. Additionally, the CDC offers excellent resources on pregnancy and home insemination.
Summary:
In our household, nudity is a non-issue. My partner and I often walk around naked in front of our kids, which has fostered a relaxed atmosphere regarding body image and anatomy. We believe it’s essential to normalize our bodies and encourage open discussions about bodily functions without shame. While my husband and I have different boundaries regarding nudity, we respect our children’s comfort levels, knowing that as they grow, their views may change.
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