As I stepped into my daughter’s room, I placed my hand on the mattress—ugh, it’s wet again. The unmistakable odor hit me as soon as I walked in, signaling the reality I was reluctantly facing. We had taken precautions: no drinks after 7 PM, and we woke 11-year-old Mia for a bathroom trip at midnight. Or at least, we intended to. I got sidetracked by a pile of laundry that demanded my attention.
Yes, our daughter still struggles with bed-wetting. She wets the bed frequently enough—about once or twice a week—that she wears pull-ups to bed. We have three waterproof mattress covers that we rotate to protect her mattress, but it still retains a faint smell of urine. We hesitate to buy a new mattress because, honestly, what’s the point? Until Mia outgrows this phase, any new mattress would face the same fate.
Initially, this was a source of great concern for us. My partner, Jake, was particularly worried and often expressed frustration. “Why can’t she just wake up and go?” he would lament. “Doesn’t she feel it?” He even questioned whether something was wrong or if she was just being lazy. But I knew that wasn’t true; Mia was always embarrassed when she realized what had happened.
After consulting our pediatrician, who confirmed Mia’s good health, I learned that prolonged bed-wetting is more common than many realize. It’s a subject often shrouded in stigma, making parents feel isolated in their struggles. However, when I opened up to a few close friends, I found that we weren’t alone at all. If your child is still wetting the bed, rest assured that you’re in good company.
When to Consult Your Doctor About Bed-Wetting
While bed-wetting is common, it can sometimes indicate a more serious condition. The Mayo Clinic advises consulting a physician if your child continues to wet the bed after age seven. Other reasons to seek medical advice include sudden bed-wetting after a stretch of dryness or if it’s accompanied by symptoms like pain, burning during urination, or excessive thirst. These could point to conditions such as urinary tract infections or, in rare cases, diabetes. If your child shows signs of fatigue and weight loss along with bed-wetting, don’t hesitate to contact your doctor.
Possible Reasons for Continued Bed-Wetting
For healthy children, several factors might contribute to ongoing bed-wetting. Some may have smaller bladders or struggle to recognize when they need to go. Deep sleepers might not receive the signals to wake up when their bladder is full. Hormonal imbalances can also play a role; a lack of anti-diuretic hormone (ADH) can lead to increased urine production at night.
Stress and anxiety can trigger bed-wetting too. If your child typically stays dry but begins wetting the bed during stressful times, it might be worth discussing with a professional. Genetics can also influence bed-wetting; children whose parents experienced the same issue are more likely to do so themselves. Additionally, children with ADHD may be more prone to bed-wetting.
Mia has a combination of factors contributing to her situation: Jake was a late bed-wetter himself, she has ADHD, and she is an exceptionally deep sleeper. Luckily, she is otherwise healthy. Our pediatrician mentioned that medication could help during sleepovers, but so far, she manages by being diligent about using the bathroom at midnight and avoiding drinks before bed. If she does have an accident, she’s comfortable enough with close family and friends to not feel too embarrassed.
We reassure her that bed-wetting is not something she can control and there’s no reason for shame. It’s involuntary, after all. Jake has come to understand this too, recognizing that his own past experiences may have influenced his initial reactions.
Strategies to Help Reduce Bed-Wetting
There are several strategies to help your child learn to wake up when they need to go. Alarms that alert them when they start to wet the bed can be effective. Limiting fluid intake a few hours before bedtime can also help, but ensure they stay hydrated during physical activities.
Encouraging “double voiding”—having them use the bathroom twice before bed—can be beneficial. I’ve even found success by waking Mia around midnight for a quick bathroom trip, which usually prevents accidents. Remember, shaming your child won’t help; it can increase anxiety, which often exacerbates the issue.
Among the parents I’ve spoken to, most report their children eventually outgrowing bed-wetting. Mia’s frequency has decreased from two to three times a week to just once or twice. Ultimately, bed-wetting is a normal phase that can take longer for some children to outgrow, and it’s crucial to approach it with understanding and patience.
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In conclusion, while bed-wetting can be challenging, it’s important to remember that many children go through this phase. Patience, understanding, and support will go a long way in helping your child navigate this experience.