As an OB/GYN, my journey into motherhood took an unexpected turn when I gave birth to my premature daughter via C-section, during which I experienced inadequate anesthesia.
The Beginning of Labor
It all began on a seemingly ordinary Friday morning. I had been through contractions before, as my daughter was diagnosed with a rare intestinal malformation called duodenal atresia, leading to an excess of amniotic fluid and a condition called polyhydramnios. However, this particular morning, as I reached 32 weeks of pregnancy, the contractions felt different—painful and regular, and they wouldn’t let up. After some deliberation, my husband, Mark, took me to the hospital.
Arrival at the Hospital
Upon arrival, I was found to be one centimeter dilated, with significant effacement, and contractions occurring every three to four minutes. Despite attempts to halt my labor, my situation worsened. A few hours later, my water broke, and I quickly dilated to eight centimeters. The realization that my baby was arriving eight weeks early hit me like a wave of fear and disbelief.
The Decision for a C-Section
Shortly after my water broke, I noticed our baby’s heart rate began to decline, a pattern I recognized all too well as an OB/GYN. The doctor suggested I begin pushing, but despite my efforts, the baby wasn’t progressing. With the heart rate dropping, it was decided that a C-section was necessary.
Inadequate Anesthesia
Before the procedure, the medical team performed an Allis clamp test to ensure the anesthesia was effective. This test involves pinching the skin with a tool to check for sensation. Unfortunately, I felt the pinch. My husband recalls me repeatedly saying, “Just wait, wait, wait!” But time was of the essence, and the team proceeded. As they made the incision, I felt everything, gripping Mark’s hand tightly and moaning in discomfort.
The Delivery
The delivery itself was swift—perhaps a minute or so—but that minute felt painfully long. I was momentarily comforted when I caught a glimpse of our daughter. Despite being preterm, she was held up for me to see, looking like a tiny warrior ready to take on the world, her little face scrunched up in determination.
Post-Delivery Relief
Afterward, the anesthesiologist administered what I affectionately refer to as “happy drugs.” These strong painkillers aren’t commonly used during C-sections due to potential respiratory issues for the baby, but I was in desperate need of relief. As the medication flowed through my IV, I started to feel lightheaded, and my next clear memory is being moved from the operating table to a recovery bed.
A Taste of Normalcy
Later that evening, a close friend brought me some fast food, which I’d craved since I hadn’t eaten all day. I savored every bite of that chicken strip, which felt like the best meal ever.
Our Hospital Experience
Our hospital experience was largely uneventful, though our daughter underwent surgery three days post-delivery. She spent a month in the NICU—a story for another time—but thankfully, she has thrived since then. Now, at age 12, she’s a brilliant child with no lasting effects from her premature birth.
Reflections on Pain and Healing
For a long time, I questioned my own experience, wondering if I had been exaggerating the pain I endured during that first C-section. When I had a repeat C-section with my second daughter, it was a completely different experience. This time, I understood what a C-section was meant to feel like—discomfort, yes, but no pain. This realization validated my initial experience and revealed the inadequacy of the anesthesia I had received.
Becoming a More Empathetic Physician
In truth, the trauma from my first surgery has shaped me into a more empathetic OB/GYN. I am attentive to my patients’ concerns about comfort during procedures and make it a priority to ensure that mothers can see their babies immediately after birth. I remember that urgent desire to connect with my child, and I’m committed to preventing others from experiencing the pain and anxiety I felt.
Further Reading
If you’re interested in more on this topic, you can check out our other blog post here. For further reading on pregnancy and home insemination, the Women’s Health website is an excellent resource.
Conclusion
In summary, my journey through an unexpected C-section has made me a better physician, deeply attuned to the needs of my patients, particularly in high-stress situations like delivering a preterm baby.