“Are you really going to hold that baby all day?”
“Don’t you think he’ll get spoiled?”
“Start teaching him to self-soothe before it’s too late.”
These remarks were directed at me when my little ones were merely newborns. Yes, newborns! I faced skepticism from strangers, relatives, and even medical professionals about whether I was “spoiling” my babies by keeping them close.
Looking back, those comments seem ridiculous. My sons are now 4 and 9, and I often find myself pleading for them to sit down and cuddle like they did when they were tiny. At the time, however, I was uncertain whether my boys would grow up to be independent, so the criticism definitely affected me.
The truth is, holding my babies nearly around the clock was not just a preference; it was a necessity. If I set them down, they would cry inconsolably. Sure, I could have let them scream to “learn” self-soothing, but every fiber of my being said that if they were crying, they needed comfort. I followed my instincts, even if it meant facing judgmental glances.
Research supports my intuition. Infants genuinely need to be held when they fuss—not merely for the sweetness of their cuddly nature but for their overall health and development. A recent study published in Pediatrics examined the long-term benefits of skin-to-skin contact for premature infants. The findings revealed that those who received this nurturing touch had higher IQs, larger gray matter areas in their brains, and even higher salaries in adulthood compared to those who did not experience skin-to-skin care. Furthermore, these infants exhibited lower incidences of hyperactivity, aggression, and school absences.
While this study focused on premature babies, similar research exists for full-term infants. A 2012 report from the Cochrane Pregnancy and Childbirth Group indicated that full-term infants who received skin-to-skin care had improved respiratory stability, higher breastfeeding rates, and less crying.
The benefits of holding your baby extend well beyond their early days. An earlier study from Pediatrics highlighted that physical closeness significantly impacts an infant’s contentment and their ability to feed effectively. Moreover, carrying your baby throughout the day can alleviate fussiness and colicky symptoms, which peak around six weeks old (any parent who has dealt with a colicky baby knows how desperate those moments can be!).
Need more proof? Research shows that holding your baby during painful medical procedures—like vaccinations—can significantly decrease their pain perception. Skin-to-skin contact also enhances breastfeeding success and strengthens the emotional bond between parent and child.
For those interested in the science behind all this, Dr. Mia Rodriguez, an expert in infant development, explains that newborn brains are in a crucial developmental phase during the first few months. The care they receive during this time is essential for optimal brain growth. “The amygdala matures during the first two months after childbirth,” Dr. Rodriguez explains, “and skin-to-skin contact activates it, fostering emotional learning and memory.”
Honestly, I wish I could go back and share this wealth of information with those who criticized my parenting choices. However, most new moms are likely too tired and overwhelmed to engage in debates or research. Fortunately, many mothers instinctively understand that their baby thrives in their arms, and the notion of spoiling a baby is simply nonsense. But if you crave scientific validation, rest assured, it’s readily available—more studies are emerging all the time.
So, to the skeptics, don’t hesitate to give them your best “resting face,” secure your baby in your embrace, and walk away. That strategy works like a charm, too.
If you’re interested in more information about skin-to-skin contact and its benefits, check out this resource, which provides extensive insights into the topic. For those considering pregnancy and home insemination, this article offers helpful details about artificial insemination methods, and this Wikipedia entry is an excellent resource for understanding the broader aspects of pregnancy.
Summary
In conclusion, holding your baby is essential for their emotional and physical development. Research continually reinforces the idea that you cannot spoil a child through love and affection. Instead of listening to outdated advice, parents should trust their instincts and prioritize their baby’s need for closeness.