Why I Was Taken Aback by My Experience at the Coffee Shop

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In the words of my three-year-old and a certain TV character, “How rude.” Lately, I’ve noticed a growing trend of people being so absorbed in their own worlds that they can’t even hold a door open for a mother managing a stroller and a toddler. That mother was me today.

Stepping into a Starbucks with two small children wasn’t my ideal plan. But when your three-year-old urgently announces that she needs to use the restroom, you have a matter of seconds before an accident turns your car into a smelly disaster. Spotting the Starbucks, I decided to make a quick stop for a much-needed caffeine boost while my daughter could use the facilities.

As I approached the door, I saw several adults lounging outside in the Florida heat. Strapped with a heavy backpack full of supplies, pushing a large stroller, and carrying my three-year-old daughter, I paused at the entrance. I looked around, expecting someone to lend a hand. Despite the presence of at least seven adults—men and women alike—not a single person rose to help. I took a deep breath and let it go. I set my daughter down, instructed her to stay close, and awkwardly pushed the door open with my foot while guiding my children inside.

After placing my order, I rushed my daughter toward the restroom, only to find it locked. She began doing the familiar “pee dance,” desperately trying to hold it in. Just then, a well-dressed older woman exited, glanced at us, and slammed the door behind her as she walked away. I was left in stunned silence.

My daughter turned to me and asked, “Mommy, why didn’t she hold the door open? She’s a grown-up.” I shook my head, unable to comprehend the lack of consideration. My little girl then bravely approached the door to assist me and her brother in the stroller. I cringed at the thought of the germs she was touching. After a quick restroom visit, I was eager to leave.

I finally grabbed my much-needed coffee and looked around at the people still gathered near the entrance. Surely, one of them would help me. Now juggling a hot drink, a stroller, and my daughter, I struggled to maneuver the door open. Not one person nearby, including a doctor in scrubs, a few men in their forties, a mother with her son, a businesswoman, and a grandfather, offered assistance.

After several attempts, we managed to escape. My daughter turned around and said, “That was rude.” Can you believe it? She’s three, yet she understands that we should help one another. As a society, we should embody kindness and consideration. I’ve always made it a point to hold doors open for those behind me, regardless of who they are. This may stem from my Midwestern upbringing, but it’s also simply about being a decent human being.

Perhaps I should have asked for help more directly. However, as my daughter pointed out, these were all adults who witnessed a tired mother struggling. I have hope for her generation, believing that respect and kindness will ultimately prevail over the selfishness we often encounter today. I will teach my son to hold doors open and instill in my daughter the importance of kindness. The way we treat others can profoundly impact their day—maybe even their lives.

So the next time you see someone, especially a mother like me, in need, lend a hand. It doesn’t take much, and it can make all the difference.

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Summary

In this article, the author recounts their shocking experience at a coffee shop where no one offered to help a struggling mother with two small children. Despite the presence of many adults, the lack of courtesy left a profound impact, illustrating a troubling trend of self-absorption in society. The author emphasizes the importance of kindness and helping one another, especially for parents managing young children.