In modern relationships where women are the primary breadwinners, it’s not uncommon for men to exaggerate their income. Surprisingly, women may also downplay their earnings — but in the opposite direction. Why do they feel the need to do this?
Research from the U.S. Census Bureau reveals that in heterosexual marriages where the wife earns more, husbands tend to claim they earn about 2.9 percentage points more than their actual salary. Conversely, wives report their earnings at 1.5 percentage points lower than the truth. This trend holds across various income levels, races, and ages.
Justin Carter, an economist at a leading university, notes that many men feel insecure when their wives bring home a larger paycheck. This isn’t shocking; however, it highlights how deeply rooted traditional gender roles remain. A Pew Research survey found that 71 percent of Americans believe a good husband must be the family’s financial provider, while only 32 percent feel the same about women.
While it’s somewhat understandable for a man to embellish his salary in light of his wife’s accomplishments, it’s baffling that women would feel compelled to diminish their success for the sake of their partner’s ego. Honestly, if I were to out-earn my husband, I’d celebrate it, not hide it! In fact, as of 2018, about 69 percent of marriages still have husbands earning more, a drop from 87 percent in 1980. Despite the strides women have made in the workplace, from facing challenges in career advancement to juggling childcare responsibilities, achieving higher earnings should be a cause for celebration.
Yet, as long as most Americans cling to the outdated notion that men must be the primary providers, we will continue to see this fragile male ego at play — where men misrepresent their income and women feel pressured to follow suit. It appears that even with progressive changes, we still have a journey ahead of us.
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In closing, this subject sheds light on the complexities of modern relationships and the lingering societal expectations that influence how couples view and discuss their financial situations.