In recent years, many individuals would be surprised to learn that I was a latecomer to social media. My early experiences were limited; I never participated in AOL chat rooms, and by the time I joined MySpace, it was already on the decline. However, everything changed when I became a mother eight years ago. I started blogging and craved deeper connections with friends and family scattered across the country.
Initially, social media was a light-hearted space for interacting with people I already knew. My friend list consisted solely of real-life acquaintances, and I was hesitant to accept requests from strangers—something I believe many of us shared back then. Fast forward to today, and the landscape has drastically shifted. We’ve lowered our defenses, exposing ourselves to a plethora of new faces on our feeds. Sometimes, I come across individuals and think, “Who is this person?”
Social media has become an integral part of our lives; it now feels like our real world. Yet, there’s one significant difference: in the real world, people mature. While we may face drama in school, adulthood often brings a realization of its pettiness. Unfortunately, in the realm of social media, it seems we are regressing. It fosters a mob mentality where people group together to criticize others, reviving old forms of name-calling while introducing new ways to throw shade.
This behavior has left me feeling frustrated and, quite frankly, embarrassed. I’ve watched grown women—mothers, no less—engage in hours-long debates over something as trivial as purchasing Instagram followers. Seriously? Who cares about Instagram followers? Yet, I found myself refreshing threads, akin to watching a dramatic movie unfold, popcorn in hand.
Even more embarrassing than being a passive observer is the times I’ve engaged in the fray myself, posting silly status updates and tweets. I’ve stirred the pot and had emotional exchanges with complete strangers. What happened to common sense?
Recently, I posted a straightforward Facebook status encouraging kindness toward others. Lately, I’ve felt self-conscious about my social media usage, opting to share less often. I carefully worded my message to avoid conflict, but someone still felt compelled to call me out for a perceived slight. When I deleted her comment, she retaliated with a curse on my page—where my pastor, colleagues, and friends from my daughter’s school can see. I was mortified. How does one explain to a friend from Bible study that the person who lashed out at me is someone I barely know, despite years of being “friends” online?
As someone whose profession revolves around the Internet, I’m more engaged with social media than many of my peers. While I appreciate the valuable connections and opportunities it can provide, I also wonder if I’m too entrenched in this digital landscape. The high school-like antics of social media are becoming tiresome. I’ve started reflecting on whether I want to invest my time in a space where arguments with virtual strangers are commonplace. Shouldn’t I be spending my time in more meaningful ways?
For now, I’ve decided to step back from social media. I’m trimming my friends list and focusing on truly connecting with those who matter. I’m also utilizing the mute, unfriend, and block options more liberally. After all, I didn’t endure four years of high school only to relive it on Facebook. Oh, how I miss MySpace.
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In summary, while social media can offer valuable connections, it can also mimic the drama of high school. Many are re-evaluating their engagement, seeking more meaningful offline interactions.