Every day during our car ride home, I routinely inquire, “How was your day?” The response from my boys is always a predictable, “Good.” That’s the extent of our conversation, leaving me feeling frustrated.
To address this communication barrier, I devised a two-step strategy to encourage more meaningful discussions.
The initial component of my plan was implemented last autumn. It was a bold move, but I braced myself for potential complaints: I eliminated all electronics from our dinner table—no television, phones, or tablets. Honestly, this should have been enforced much sooner; previously, meals were dominated by my kids engrossed in their devices. The reaction to this change was less than enthusiastic, and I suspect there were some tears. However, this shift has transformed our dinner time into an opportunity for genuine engagement and conversation. The first part of my strategy proved to be effective.
The second part aimed to foster deeper dialogues with my kids—real conversations that go beyond typical sibling disputes. To achieve this, I began asking questions, just as one would when getting to know someone new. After extensive research and contemplation, I compiled a list of inquiries that have prompted some enlightening discussions. On many evenings, our dinner routine revolves around these questions, sometimes leading us to linger at the table long after the meal is over.
Questions to Inspire Family Discussions
To inspire your own family discussions, here are several questions that have catalyzed fantastic conversations with my sons:
- What was the highlight of your day?
- What did you find most challenging today?
- Can you share a moment when you were kind to someone?
- Who did you spend time with today, and what activities did you enjoy?
- How does this year differ from last year for you?
- What rules at school differ from those at home, and why do you think that is?
- Who do you usually sit with during lunch?
- Describe yourself in five words.
- What activity brings you the most joy?
- What’s the most amazing thing that has happened to you recently?
- What was the worst experience you had today, and what lesson did you learn?
- If you could travel back three years and give yourself advice, what would it be?
- What are you thankful for right now?
- Who is your best friend, and what makes that person special to you?
- If you had the power to change the world, what would you do?
It’s important to vary the questions each time. Often, we don’t make it through the entire list before dinner concludes, yet some evenings extend delightfully as we share and connect. Feel free to use these questions or create your own, and focus on keeping the conversation positive and thought-provoking. Listening to their responses offers a fascinating glimpse into their perspectives.
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In summary, cultivating open lines of communication with your children can significantly enhance your family relationships. Asking the right questions not only fosters connection but also deepens your understanding of their world.