Recently, my partner kept messaging me, “I’ll be home any minute,” and “just waiting for the bus.” It was nearly 7 PM when he finally walked through the door. Whether it was fatigue or the children’s restlessness, by the time he arrived, I felt ready to escape.
I frequently reach my limit. Life with young kids often oscillates between moments of pure joy and chaotic frustration. My emotions can swing dramatically; one minute I’m soaring high with happiness, and the next, I’m crashing down into despair, all within a single tick of the clock.
Just the other day, my children were happily playing together on the top bunk in my son’s room. They cuddled with their stuffed animals, giggling and wriggling like playful puppies. My son made his sister laugh uncontrollably, and in return, she tickled him under the chin and teased him. It was a beautiful display of sibling love, and I felt an overwhelming sense of pride for the healthy, joyful children I was raising. Everything seemed perfect.
Moments later, as I turned to brush my teeth, everything changed. Laughter gave way to screams, giggles turned into wails, and affectionate cuddles became shoves. Toys were hurled across the room, and my heart raced with anxiety as I rushed in to separate them before someone got hurt. Both kids were crying, and in their minds, it felt like the end of the world. It was one of those instances where I just wanted to throw in the towel.
Growing up, quitting was my go-to strategy whenever I faced challenges. I abandoned competitive swimming, gymnastics, and various art classes after a few years because I wasn’t excelling. My worldview was simple: stick to the easy and enjoyable, and steer clear of the difficult. This perspective worked well when it was just me to consider, and even when my partner joined the picture.
However, the journey of motherhood has proven to be the most challenging chapter of my life thus far. The early years were marked by relentless sleep deprivation, and I’m still not sure how I survived them. My deep love for my newborn son—and later my daughter—taught me that just because something is hard doesn’t mean it isn’t worthwhile. These incredible little beings, whom I nurtured and cared for, even through tears, are mine to cherish.
I’ve come to understand that feeling like quitting is a normal part of parenting; anyone claiming that it’s all blissful perfection is not being truthful. Raising infants and toddlers is akin to riding a never-ending ferris wheel. Unfortunately, there’s no kind operator at the bottom who can stop it so you can catch your breath.
All we can do is embrace the joyful peaks and fleeting moments of happiness. We must take deep breaths, capture those memories in photographs, revel in our son’s warm embrace, and trace our daughter’s dimples with our fingertips. It’s essential to store those perfect moments in our minds so we can recall them during chaotic days when the noise is overwhelming, and we feel like we’re scraping the bottom.
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In summary, the emotional rollercoaster of parenting is filled with ups and downs, but recognizing that wanting to give up is normal can help us navigate these turbulent times. Embrace the joyful moments, and lean on resources available to support your parenting journey.