By: Mia Thompson
Recently, while attending a work function, a young girl approached me on the sidewalk, offering a box filled with handmade jewelry. She shared that her sales would help her mother pay a phone bill. Feeling generous and touched by her story, I purchased a beautiful bracelet and told her to keep the change. The bracelet, a simple blue yarn piece with the word “FREE” inscribed, has since become a daily reminder of my newfound independence. After years of being in a relationship, this token encourages me to shift my mindset and embrace my freedom.
While the divorce process was challenging, my life has taken on a different shape. Yes, there are new complexities as I navigate being a working parent, but there are also numerous advantages to being single. Here are 21 reasons why I’m thankful for my independence:
- My Decisions Matter: In my marriage, I often deferred to my partner’s preferences, whether it was about dinner choices or household chores. Now, I make choices that reflect my desires.
- Freedom to Eat What I Want: I can indulge in my favorite midnight snacks without anyone raising an eyebrow. Ice cream at 2 AM? Absolutely!
- Financial Control: I manage my own finances without worrying about someone else’s spending habits. Each transaction reflects my needs and priorities.
- Less Anxiety About Loneliness: Although I miss adult conversations, I no longer feel the frustration of waiting for someone to come home. My worries have diminished.
- No More Cleaning Up After Someone Else: Balancing work and parenting is tough enough. I appreciate maintaining a tidy home without someone else’s clutter.
- Time for Myself: My schedule is mine alone. I no longer coordinate my plans to accommodate someone else.
- No Need for Approval: I spent years seeking validation that often felt out of reach. Now, my own opinions are the most important.
- Wardrobe Freedom: I choose my clothing based on my preferences, even if my budget is tight.
- No Judgment for Mistakes: I take responsibility for my actions without facing constant criticism from a partner.
- Space to Breathe: My home has become my sanctuary, with ample room for my belongings and personal comfort.
- The TV Is All Mine: After the kids are asleep, I control the remote.
- Holidays on My Terms: I can choose to celebrate with my family or take a break if the kids are with their father.
- My Own Pace: I value punctuality and now move through life on my schedule, without waiting on others.
- New Romantic Possibilities: The world of dating is open to me, and I can explore it without the intention of remarriage.
- Bedtime is My Choice: I relish the quiet after the kids are asleep, without distractions from a partner.
- Less Stress: Being single has lightened my emotional load.
- Independent Opinions: My life is now more tranquil, free from arguments that once consumed my time.
- Creative Freedom: I can pursue my passions—writing, painting, and dreaming—without restrictions.
- No Excuses for Others: I no longer feel the need to defend someone else’s actions, allowing me to focus on my well-being.
- I Drive Now: I hold the steering wheel—literally and metaphorically—of my life.
- Crafting My Future: I cherish the memories of my marriage, especially our children, but I look forward to the exciting possibilities ahead.
For far too long, I compromised and lost a sense of self. Now, with my bracelet as a reminder of my freedom, I embrace this new chapter.
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Summary
Embracing life post-divorce brings newfound independence and opportunities. From making individual choices to managing finances and personal time, the journey of self-discovery is empowering. With a focus on personal growth and freedom, the future is bright.