Hello there, I’m your pediatrician, and I have something important to share. You’ve likely felt it before, a lingering doubt that creeps in during our visits. You catch yourself asking me not to judge you or expressing your fears about not being the “perfect” mom.
You might worry about what I think as your children bounce around the office, or if I’ll overlook the stories you want to share. You fear that my judgment will come down hard on you for not having everything figured out. But here’s the truth: I often have thoughts about you that I hold back. I do this because I sense you might not hear me.
I want to assure you that you are too tough on yourself. It’s clear to anyone how deeply you care for your kids and how hard you strive to be a great parent. I wish I could encourage you to relax and stop stressing over finding that one perfect parenting technique.
It’s Okay to Take a Break
I understand those moments when you feel overwhelmed and snap at your kids. They can be absolutely adorable but also a handful, can’t they? I want to tell you that it’s perfectly okay to cut back on your kids’ activities so you can reclaim some “me” time. My usual advice is that they might be overscheduled and could benefit from a lighter load. I say this because it’s true, but also because I worry you won’t believe me if I point out your own well-being as a valid reason.
Your children adore you, even when they act out. No one else can step into the role of mom, as you are fundamental to their sense of identity. You are enough, just as you are. You possess everything you need to be the loving, connected mother you aspire to be. I see it in you often, and I deeply respect and honor your journey.
The Power of Presence and Curiosity
When you gaze at your child with love, it’s an inspiring sight. I want you to know that we are in this together.
Did you know I have my own secret? I live in your neighborhood, and I occasionally wonder what you think of me when you spot me at the supermarket with my children. It’s a chaotic scene, and I sometimes worry that you might question my parenting skills based on that. I wonder if you think I have everything under control or if you’d be surprised to learn that I don’t. Would it help you to know that my kids bring me joy too?
If I could share two key attributes that can significantly benefit your kids, I would say they are presence and curiosity. When mothers are genuinely present with their children, it fulfills a profound need for authentic connection. Mothers who are curious and open often come to understand their kids in unique ways and find the support they need.
As your pediatrician, I want you to know this secret—just don’t share it with anyone else.
Additional Resources
For more insights on parenting, you might find our post on the couples’ fertility journey useful. If you’re considering options, this resource on selecting a familiar donor provides excellent guidance. Additionally, The Center is a fantastic source for pregnancy and home insemination information.
In Summary
You are doing better than you think. Embrace your journey, cherish your connections, and remember that you’re not alone in this.