If you’ve breastfed a toddler, you’re likely aware that nursing can take on a whole new level of “interesting.” As little ones grow, nursing sessions often transform into an adventurous playtime, with toddlers using your body as their own personal jungle gym. It can be amusing at times, but it’s also incredibly frustrating and, let’s be honest, often painful.
Toddlers are notorious for their curious hands. Typically, one hand is tucked away while the other is busy exploring everything in sight. They develop a range of peculiar “nursing habits”—some endearing, others absolutely intolerable. From twirling your hair to playing with your lips, these little ones can be quite the handful. I’ve even encountered one who had a penchant for pinching, which is a whole different level of fun.
For me, the ultimate annoyance was nipple twiddling. Just the thought sends a shiver down my spine. If you’re unfamiliar, nipple twiddling is when a nursing toddler decides to poke and twist your other nipple with their free hand. No, thank you!
When my first child, Oliver, took up this habit, I wasn’t quite sure how to handle it. I’d heard about “gentle redirection” and tried various distractions—singing, reading, even introducing a nursing necklace. But nothing seemed to work. It wasn’t until a friend advised me to simply say “no” that I found my footing. She reminded me that breastfeeding should be a mutually enjoyable experience, and I could indeed teach my little one some basic “nursing manners.”
From that moment, I firmly told Oliver that nipple twiddling was a no-go. If he persisted, we’d take a break from nursing until he stopped. I also switched to wearing a snug sports bra for extra protection. Within weeks, he got the message, and those annoying antics faded away—well, mostly.
By the time my second son, Ethan, arrived, I was prepared. As soon as I noticed him reaching for that free nipple, I gently redirected his hand and reinforced my protective bra strategy. Thankfully, he never picked up the nipple-twiddling habit but instead developed a knack for lip-pulling, which, while annoying, was far more manageable.
Setting Boundaries
Every nursing parent has their pet peeves. The good news is you don’t have to endure them without a fight. Setting boundaries is a perfectly valid option. Teach your toddler where their hands can and can’t wander. If they’re using acrobatics during nursing, it’s okay to put your foot down. Establish limits on when and how often they can nurse, and encourage them to ask politely for their milk. Manners matter and can make for much more pleasant nursing sessions.
Remember, establishing boundaries takes time, and there will likely be some tears—yours and theirs. But teaching your child some “nursing manners” is beneficial for everyone involved and far better than feeling your blood pressure rise with every latch.
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In summary, nursing a toddler can come with its share of challenges, but with patience and clear boundaries, you can create a more enjoyable experience for both you and your child.