Did you know that the National Center for Victims of Crime reveals that 1 in 5 girls will experience molestation? I was one of those girls.
It started at a sleepover. We were huddled together on a pullout couch in the living room. She was almost a year older and managed to persuade me into doing things I instinctively knew were wrong. Fear and intimidation clouded my judgment, and I felt trapped, unable to voice my discomfort.
Molestation is just one of many forms of childhood trauma. Others include physical abuse, witnessing violence, chronic neglect, natural disasters, and even the loss of a loved one. According to the National Child Traumatic Stress Network, a staggering 68% of children will face a traumatic event before they turn 16. While not all develop PTSD, 20% still struggle with academic, emotional, and physical challenges. And the scars of trauma don’t simply vanish as we enter adulthood; they linger, affecting our lives in profound ways.
In my case, the sleepovers didn’t stop—fear silenced me, and I was repeatedly molested at just 7 years old. This cycle of abuse led me to withdraw in school, making me an easy target for bullying. My grades suffered, and I was often overwhelmed with tears.
When I say that trauma sticks with you, I mean it. The International Center for Trauma Stress Studies notes that those who have experienced childhood trauma often grapple with anxiety, guilt, sadness, and anger—emotions that may seem disconnected from their past experiences. I often felt an irrational guilt over trivial matters, like a messy kitchen, which was completely out of my control. Tragically, childhood trauma predisposes individuals to higher rates of anxiety, depression, and even substance abuse.
In my experience, the abuse I suffered triggered a dormant depression. Though I had a genetic predisposition to mental health issues, the severity of my depression might have been delayed without the abuse. It consumed my childhood; I felt like a shadow of myself, often isolated and friendless. I resorted to self-harm and struggled with disordered eating, desperately trying to erase my existence.
This battle didn’t end upon reaching adulthood or graduating high school. Trauma has a way of resurfacing; it finds new cracks to exploit. My experiences led me to believe I was unworthy of love, a notion reinforced by my untreated depression and lack of support from my parents.
Research from the Association for Psychological Science shows that childhood trauma significantly increases the risk of developing depressive disorders. The impact of early-life stress can alter the brain’s neurobiological systems, making it impossible to simply “get over it.” One study revealed that a staggering 75.6% of chronically depressed patients reported significant histories of childhood trauma.
Eventually, I sought help. A combination of cognitive behavioral therapy and medication has allowed me to find peace. For those dealing with PTSD, various treatment options exist, such as prolonged exposure therapy, which helps individuals confront trauma-related memories and feelings, and eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), a method backed by the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. My best friend found success with EMDR after enduring her own traumas.
While childhood trauma is challenging, it is treatable. There is hope for a brighter future, and we don’t have to be shackled by our pasts. However, reaching out for help is vital—often requiring a nudge from someone who cares. In my case, that support came from my partner.
Children today face their own battles—whether from natural disasters like Hurricanes Harvey and Maria or witnessing violence. Many face abuse and neglect, leaving lasting scars that can’t be ignored. They need resources, counseling, and most importantly, a safe environment to process their experiences. If they receive the support they need, they can break the cycle of depression and anxiety.
We can’t just expect children to “get over it.” But with help and understanding, healing is possible—for them and for us.
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In summary, childhood trauma is not something that can be brushed aside. It affects individuals deeply and requires understanding, compassion, and professional help. By acknowledging this, we can create a supportive environment for healing.