In a heartfelt display of remembrance, a father named Jake Thompson participated in the Sunshine Coast Marathon in Australia, pushing an empty stroller as a poignant symbol of his stillborn son, Mark. During the race, a bystander jokingly remarked, “Hey mate, you’ve lost your kid!” To which Jake, who had encountered this type of comment frequently throughout the day, responded, “Yes, that’s the point.”
Jake and his partner, Lisa, experienced the heartbreak of losing their first child, Mark, who was stillborn at 27 weeks in early 2016. The couple discovered the heartbreaking news during a routine ultrasound, which revealed that their baby no longer had a heartbeat. Just days later, Lisa delivered Mark, leaving a profound void in their lives.
Sharing the Experience
In a Facebook post detailing his marathon experience, Jake shared how friends, Sam and Ryan, accompanied him on the run, stepping in to respond to questions when it became overwhelming. “As we started the second lap, the announcer said, ‘Here comes old mate and it looks like he lost his kid,’ prompting more laughter from the crowd,” Jake recounted. Despite the emotional toll of hearing those words repeatedly, he found solace in the acknowledgment of his son’s existence: “Each time someone mentioned it, they recognized that I lost my son. It’s important for parents who have faced such loss to hear their child’s name and know they are remembered.”
Jake continued, “Going to the hospital for the birth felt bittersweet, knowing our baby wouldn’t come home. His clothes remained untouched, and his crib stood empty. We smiled through our grief because we were still a family.” The couple held Mark until dawn, cherishing every moment they had with him.
The Pain of Loss
For many families, the pain of losing a child, whether through miscarriage or stillbirth, can feel insurmountable. “Grief comes in waves,” Jake noted. “One minute you’re fine, and the next, memories of holding your son flood back, leading to tears.” To cope with his loss, Jake turned to triathlon, competing in various events including the Long Course Triathlon Nationals and Ironman New Zealand in the year following Mark’s burial.
Lisa has kept Mark’s memory alive by placing a small giraffe at the table during family gatherings. The symbol of two giraffes — a large one and a small one side by side — represents their charity, Mark’s Legacy, which aims to raise awareness and support families affected by stillbirth. Jake intentionally ran the marathon without signs, hoping to spark conversations. “I didn’t realize how many questions would arise,” he admitted.
Welcoming a New Family Member
In May, the couple welcomed Mark’s little brother, Oliver, into their family. However, they emphasize that Oliver does not replace the loss of Mark. Jake poignantly stated, “It’s like saying, ‘Our child died at school, but that’s okay because we have another one coming.’ That doesn’t lessen how deeply we miss our first son.”
Mark’s Legacy and Future Goals
Mark’s Legacy raised around $6,000 last year, and they are currently working towards a goal of $5,000 for 2017, having already raised over $2,000 this year. For those considering expanding their family, exploring options like a home insemination kit can be a viable path, as discussed in our blog on the subject. Additionally, for anyone looking for expert insights on fertility, you can check out solutions provided by authorities like Intracervical Insemination. For comprehensive information about pregnancy and options like IVF, visit Wikipedia on In Vitro Fertilisation.
A Touching Tribute
In summary, Jake Thompson’s marathon run serves as a touching tribute to his son Mark, raising awareness and fostering conversations about the often-taboo subject of stillbirth. It’s a reminder of the enduring love parents have for their children, no matter how brief their time on Earth may be.