When I was around 8 or 9, I visited a friend’s house and witnessed something that left a lasting impression on me. After a minor misbehavior, she was taken into another room, spanked, and returned to me with a flushed face and tear-filled eyes. Her parents didn’t yell or express overt anger, but the whole situation unsettled me. I couldn’t fathom the reason behind the spanking; it seemed like just a typical mistake that any kid could make.
I grew up in a household where spanking was not a practice. The thought of my parents hitting me for any reason seemed unfathomable, especially for something I didn’t perceive as particularly wrong. My perspective on spanking has remained largely unchanged over the years. To me, hitting anyone is inherently wrong, and striking a child on the bottom feels bizarrely justifiable to some. We teach children that their bodies are not to be touched inappropriately, yet it’s somehow acceptable to hit them there as a form of punishment? It has always struck me as odd.
Many individuals are accustomed to the spanking they experienced as children and often don’t see it as harmful. In fact, many consider it a cornerstone of discipline, believing that raising a well-behaved child without it is impossible. While I have my own anecdotal experiences to share, they pale in comparison to the vast body of research available.
Over the past fifty years, countless studies have examined the effects of spanking, and the conclusions are alarming. A 2016 meta-analysis published in the Journal of Family Psychology, which reviewed data from 160,000 children, found that spanking is not just ineffective but can be detrimental. The findings indicated that children who are spanked tend to misbehave more frequently, display antisocial behavior, and suffer from mental health issues. These children often defy their parents more, show greater aggression, and experience cognitive difficulties. In essence, spanking fails as a discipline method.
This isn’t a one-off finding either. A 2002 analysis of 88 studies also revealed numerous negative consequences associated with spanking, such as strained parent-child relationships and an impaired ability to distinguish right from wrong. The only short-term benefit noted was immediate compliance with parental instructions, but this effect diminished over time, even with continued spanking.
It’s also crucial to clarify that the studies being referenced do not include what would be classified as child abuse. The focus is on what many consider “normal” spanking. However, the research indicates a concerning trend: the more parents resort to spanking, the higher the likelihood of crossing the line into abuse at some point. The distinction between spanking and abuse is not as clear as many believe.
Elizabeth Brooks, a researcher involved in the 2016 study, noted, “We as a society often view spanking and physical abuse as separate actions. Yet, our findings show that spanking is associated with similar negative outcomes for children as abuse, albeit to a lesser extent.”
Defenders of spanking frequently argue, “I was spanked and I turned out just fine,” or “Spanking is not abuse.” Others claim, “We spank, and our kids are well-behaved with a solid relationship, so those studies are nonsense,” or suggest that the decline of society is due to a lack of spanking among kids today.
Will every child who experiences spanking manifest these negative behaviors? Not necessarily. But the likelihood is higher compared to children who are not subjected to it. Is it possible to raise well-adjusted, respectful children without resorting to spanking? Absolutely. Do some children require more effort to teach and guide? Certainly. But that does not justify the need for spanking.
Just as it took time and research to establish the importance of seat belts and car seats for safety in vehicles, we now have decades of research on the impacts of spanking. The overwhelming consensus is clear: the risks outweigh any perceived benefits. As we learn more, we should apply that knowledge to find healthier, more effective methods of disciplining children.
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In summary, decades of evidence suggest that spanking is not a beneficial form of discipline. The risks and potential harm far exceed any short-lived compliance it may foster. As responsible caregivers, we should embrace alternative methods that promote healthy development and understanding.