I recently took my eldest daughter, Lily, on a camping trip. We were participating in an annual father-daughter event organized by our community group, and it was just the two of us. My younger daughter, Emma, who just turned 3, is a bit too wild for a camping experience—I’m pretty sure “Welcome to the Jungle” is about taking a toddler outdoors.
So, it was just Lily and me. At 8 years old, she sports brown hair with bangs and has an undeniable love for vibrant leggings. This was our fourth year attending this one-night camping getaway. We’ve developed a charming little tradition: we stop for McDonald’s on our way, have a spontaneous dance party in the car, and wind down the night with storytime in the tent. I’m not entirely sure how we adopted this routine, but as we drove, Lily asked, “Daddy, will you always take me camping?”
Now, here’s the truth: I’m not particularly fond of camping. Once upon a time, I enjoyed backpacking in my twenties, but now, as a father of three in my mid-30s, I’m not keen on sacrificing a comfortable night’s sleep for the cold, hard ground. Even with an air mattress, camping doesn’t provide the best rest. Yet, I recognize that carving out time with my daughter is invaluable, and these camping trips are a wonderful opportunity for that.
Throughout our drive, Lily excitedly shared stories about gymnastics—the pommel horse (which she amusingly called the hobby horse)—and her favorite trampoline. She talked about school, her love for Twilight Sparkle from My Little Pony, and her struggles with math, which she begrudgingly accepts. I mostly listened, punctuating her stories with a few questions and smiles, reveling in her joy.
This is how I usually spend time with Lily. However, it doesn’t always require grand gestures. Sometimes we simply sit on the couch watching her favorite shows, often My Little Pony, or treat ourselves to ice cream while she recounts amusing school tales. I make sure to engage, reassuring her that her thoughts and feelings matter. Though her current musings may not seem weighty, I know that will change, and I want her to feel confident voicing her opinions, regardless of the audience.
More than anything, I want Lily to appreciate our bond. I hope she sees me as a confidant and a loving father, not someone she feels she needs to seek out elsewhere for understanding. As she grows into her teenage years, I aspire for her to view me as an ally, rather than an antagonist, avoiding the stereotype of the distant dad who only enforces rules without showing love.
I often wonder if my hopes for our relationship are unrealistic. Having never been a little girl myself and lacking a close relationship with my own father, I sometimes feel like I’m navigating uncharted territory. However, I believe all fathers wish for the best for their daughters, and nurturing a foundation built on listening and shared experiences is a strong way to foster a positive father-daughter relationship.
As we drove, Lily looked back at me, awaiting my answer to her camping question. I considered my aversion to camping but focused on the relationship I wanted to build. “I’ll take you camping for as many years as you’ll allow me,” I responded. Her gap-toothed smile lit up the car as we resumed our dance party, with the radio pumping our favorite tunes.
There’s no one else I’d rather camp with than my daughter.
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Summary:
This heartfelt piece highlights a father’s reflections on his camping trips with his daughter, emphasizing the importance of quality time, open communication, and nurturing a strong father-daughter relationship. Through their shared experiences, he aims to foster a sense of confidence and value in his daughter’s thoughts and feelings.