Last weekend, I found myself dedicating an entire 12 hours to watching my son in four baseball games. Yes, 12 hours—complete with a few 45-minute drives to the field, rising at the crack of dawn, and nervously nibbling on my nails. I also consumed copious amounts of coffee while reflecting on my life choices. Waking up before sunrise to watch 10-year-olds strike out and chase after balls can do that to anyone.
Sometimes I wonder if sports parents, including myself, have lost a few marbles. Let’s face it: organized sports aren’t for everyone, and many families choose to sit them out completely. For us, however, it’s a bonding experience. We all enjoy baseball, both playing and watching, which makes it a family affair.
My husband and I maintain a pretty relaxed approach to sports; we don’t let games or practices dominate our lives. Instead, we emphasize the valuable lessons organized sports teach our kids about teamwork, confidence, and perseverance. Generally, our experiences have been overwhelmingly positive, but here’s a little secret for my fellow sports parents: you really need to chill out.
Honestly, I don’t spend my weekends expecting my son to land a college scholarship or become a pro athlete. Most of us aren’t racing from school to practice while tossing snacks to our kids in the backseat because they’re on a winning team. We’re not sacrificing sleep and time for swim meets or hockey games hoping our kids will be the next Michael Phelps or Alex Morgan. We do it simply because it brings our kids happiness, and in turn, that brings us joy.
But you, fellow sports parent, are draining every bit of joy from the experience. For the love of all things athletic, please calm down before you ruin it for everyone—especially your child. You seem friendly at first, cheering for our kids and supporting good plays on both sides. Yet, before long, you’re standing on the bleachers berating the umpire for a call that didn’t go your way. This negativity is embarrassing for all of us.
While most of my experiences have been positive, your intensity stands out like a sore thumb. You start off as a reasonable person who just wants their child to enjoy sports, but then you’re throwing your hat in frustration after a missed play or laughing at a kid who’s just trying to have fun. You’ve transformed from a supportive fan into a fanatic, and it’s uncomfortable for everyone around you.
You might even say, in your sweetest tone, that your son’s team is struggling, and it’s difficult for him to enjoy the game because of it. You laugh about the kid who’s distracted by nature in the outfield, all while claiming you want your son to “perform his best.” Really? These are just kids, playing a game!
I’ll admit, I sometimes question if I’m the one who’s misunderstood. You sound so convinced in your sweet voice, and your child appears to be a talented athlete, so maybe I’m missing something. Should I push my own kid harder? Encourage more ambition? The answer is a firm NO.
I understand competitive sports—I swam for 13 years, even at a Big 10 university. I get hard work and dedication. But this? This is madness. The reality is that the odds of your child making it to the NBA or MLB are slim. If you’re investing time and resources with the hope of a financial return, you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. That is not the purpose of organized sports, nor should it be our purpose as parents.
Sure, it would be nice if my son excelled at athletics, but that’s not my primary hope for him. I want my kids to grow up to be kind and compassionate individuals. I want them to lend a hand to others and understand the values of hard work and collaboration, without tying their self-worth to winning. Above all, I want them to find joy in their pursuits, whether that’s hitting a home run or creating a beautiful bouquet of flowers.
So please, sports parents, take a deep breath. These are kids, and it’s just a game. Keep your cool for their sake and for the rest of us.
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In summary, let’s remember that youth sports are about fun, teamwork, and life lessons, not pressure or perfection.