Ah, summer! A time when parents who stay at home or work remotely relish a break from the structured chaos of the school year. Sure, there are still a million things to do, but there’s something liberating about the absence of that rigid schedule. However, summer also brings its own set of challenges — and I don’t just mean the relentless consumption of ice pops (seriously, if I had a dollar for every time I exclaimed, “I just bought these!”).
The real issue arises when you’re home with your kids and suddenly your house transforms into the go-to hangout for other children the moment they utter the dreaded words, “I’m bored!” You know the type: the ones who ring your doorbell before you’ve had your morning coffee and seem to have mastered the art of overstaying their welcome. They come over daily, devouring your snacks and enjoying your air conditioning like they belong there.
Now, don’t get me wrong. I enjoy having my children’s friends over to play; it keeps them entertained and lessens their bickering. But when the doorbell rings and my kids exchange nervous glances, knowing it’s Tyler From Next Door — who was just here for six hours yesterday and is likely aiming to break that record today — it puts me in a bit of a dilemma.
Do I tell Tyler that we have plans when really I’m just planning to lounge around? That feels dishonest. But I also can’t be brutally honest and say, “Tyler, you’re here way too much, and your whiny demeanor is starting to grate on us.” After all, I want to teach my kids the importance of inclusivity. So, I invite him in once more, hoping he finds it boring enough to retreat back home.
Spoiler alert: he never does.
Meanwhile, he’s munching through snacks at an alarming rate, and during lunchtime, guess who’s also sitting at the table? That’s right — Tyler, with his own plate in hand. And what about his parents? They seem blissfully unaware of his extended absences, which can stretch from hours into days.
I totally understand the allure of having someone else keep an eye on your kids during summer. After all, isn’t that why summer camps are such a hit? But at camp, there’s a structured environment, and parents actually pay for that experience.
I, too, would relish an afternoon without kids around. But here’s the catch: I believe sending my children to other people’s homes daily, uninvited, without any time limits, is downright inconsiderate.
I want to roam around my house without a bra for as long as possible, without worrying about traumatizing anyone other than my own children, who are already accustomed to it. I want to buy snacks that last longer than two days, and I’d love to work without constant interruptions (believe me, my own kids provide plenty of those).
I want to zone out occasionally and not have to monitor Tyler, who I don’t know as well as I know my own kids and who has a different set of rules at his house. When you’re the adult in charge, you have to supervise, and it can be exhausting when parents unconsciously put that responsibility on you. Turning a child away can hurt their feelings, and it’s not their fault.
So, fellow parents, please be mindful of your kids’ whereabouts this summer. A quick text or call before sending them off would go a long way. If you need them to be out of your hair for a significant portion of the day, consider enrolling them in a daycare — which, by the way, is not my home.
For more parenting insights, you can check out this blog post for tips on home insemination, or if you’re looking for fun summer activities, this guide on kiddie pools might be just what you need. And for additional resources on pregnancy and home insemination, this site offers excellent information.
In summary, while summer allows for some much-needed downtime, it’s essential for parents to communicate about their children’s playdates and not turn someone else’s home into a free daycare.