One of the most significant challenges of my childhood was the fact that both of my grandparents lived in different states, each over 1,000 miles away. Reflecting on that time, I’m amazed that, even three decades ago—long before the advent of email and video calls—I managed to maintain meaningful bonds with them that shaped my identity. I remember eagerly waiting until after 7 p.m. to call, when long-distance rates were lower, always careful to consider the time differences. Those conversations with my grandma were cherished moments; she truly enjoyed our chats.
Now that all my grandparents have passed, I often find myself longing for those connections. Sometimes, I ponder what it would be like to have their wisdom and encouragement as I navigate adulthood and parenthood myself. I often think, if only Grandma could see how far I’ve come!
Fortunately, I interact with many grandparents in my profession. As a geriatric counselor, I work with older adults in their homes, addressing prevalent issues like social isolation, depression, and anxiety. These problems remind us of the importance of connection as we age.
In my sessions, I frequently inquire about my clients’ relationships with their grandchildren. While some have warm, close ties, a significant number do not. Even if their grandkids live nearby, the distance in their relationships can feel just as vast as if they were on the other side of the globe.
There are valid reasons for this disconnect, but I can’t help but wonder if we, as parents, aren’t doing enough to nurture the bonds between our children and their grandparents. I’m not just talking about inviting them to watch a soccer game or school recital; mere observation does not equate to genuine connection.
Reflecting on my own experiences, I realize how much I would have missed had my parents not encouraged those long-distance calls or taught me to write heartfelt letters, complete with stamps. Summer visits with my grandma were unforgettable; we’d indulge in strawberry shortcake for dinner, partake in local library programs, and bond over nightly crossword puzzles. I often wished she could move closer to me!
In her 90s, our friendship remained vibrant. She was always relevant to my life, and I believe a part of that was due to the connection we shared. Over nearly three decades, we didn’t just witness each other’s milestones; we truly knew each other through shared experiences, conversations, and letters, even when distance made it difficult.
Today, we have countless tools at our disposal to help our children and parents forge meaningful relationships. Sadly, society often segregates people by age, leading to less interaction across generations. This trend deprives us of invaluable learning experiences and shared histories. One of my greatest joys was being known as “Mimi’s granddaughter,” and I want my children to have that same closeness with my parents. It’s beneficial for everyone and contributes positively to humanity.
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In summary, it’s vital to prioritize and cultivate connections with our grandparents, as these relationships enrich our lives and foster a sense of belonging. By nurturing these bonds, we not only honor our past but also create a supportive network for future generations.