A few years back, my family and I were visiting some friends. Our kids, all around the same age, were busy playing while the adults enjoyed some much-needed adult conversation. I stepped into the kitchen to grab a glass of water, and what I found made me cringe: my child’s grimy socks, crumpled up and casually left on our friend’s kitchen counter.
You might think this behavior could be forgiven if the culprit was just a toddler, but no — my child was ten years old.
Unfortunately, this wasn’t a one-time incident; it’s merely one example of how my kids have managed to turn simple parenting challenges into a series of cringe-worthy moments. I like to think of myself as someone with refined tastes. Sure, we find humor in the occasional fart joke, but that’s about as far as our lack of decorum goes. My husband and I have made every effort to instill good manners in our children, yet I fear we might be failing spectacularly.
One child, who shall remain anonymous, had the unsettling habit of picking their nose and wiping the evidence on their pillow every night. I can only assume it was a nightly ritual because, on laundry day, I’d discover a veritable forest of crusty boogers at one end of the pillowcase. How repulsive!
All three of our kids went through a phase of nose-picking, despite our best efforts to model better behavior. We demonstrated how to use tissues, issued constant reminders to keep their fingers out of their noses, and made them wash their hands after digging for treasure. Yet, they persisted.
And to add insult to injury, we sometimes caught them in the act of not just picking their noses, but eating the boogers too. Just writing that makes me gag a little. I vividly recall one incident when my four-year-old, surrounded by family at a restaurant, went deep into their nasal cavity. I told them to remove their finger, and they did — along with a huge booger. As I started to tell them to grab a tissue, they popped that finger right into their mouth. It felt like time slowed as I yelled, “Noooo!” in a voice that echoed with despair. The public setting only made the embarrassment more acute.
I find myself questioning where we went astray. Are children just inherently gross? Does it take years of relentless training to mold them into decent human beings? Are we simply dealing with kids who are on the messier side of normal?
The worst part is the judgment I can feel from others. “Aren’t you their parents? What have you taught them?” Every time one of my children does something cringe-worthy, I want to hold up a sign that screams, “I PROMISE WE DIDN’T TEACH THEM THIS!”
On the bright side, we’ve successfully raised one child into their teenage years, and they’re no longer embarrassing in public. Our middle child has also become less prone to public displays of grossness, giving me hope that our parenting methods are effective over time.
I felt a bit better the other day when a friend’s son visited us and left his dirty socks on our dining table. He’s also ten! My immediate reaction was, “Ew!” Followed quickly by, “Oh, thank heavens!”
It’s comforting to know that our kids aren’t the only ones navigating the world of grossness. If you’re facing similar issues, remember that you’re not alone. For more parenting tips and tricks, check out our resource on fertility supplements to boost your chances of conception, or read about grooming essentials to keep your home clean and tidy.
In summary, childhood can be filled with moments of utter disgust that challenge our patience and decorum. While it’s easy to feel overwhelmed by our children’s less-than-pleasant habits, remember that with time, they often grow out of these phases.