As a parent, I often find myself grappling with feelings of guilt. When you have a gifted child, it’s easy to fall into the trap of believing your child’s struggles are a reflection of your parenting. My son, Leo, is capable of reading at an advanced level, yet I was horrified to discover that, at age 7, he didn’t recognize his lowercase letters. His handwriting was a challenge, and his spelling was often unintelligible. Words like “boter” for “butter” and “lvoe” for “love” filled his papers. He couldn’t even spell his last name correctly.
We dedicated countless hours to homeschooling, but writing became a source of frustration for Leo. He would sit at his desk, lined paper in front of him, laboring to write just a few sentences about simple topics. Despite our brainstorming sessions and discussions about relevant subjects from our social studies or reading materials, it felt like a monumental task for him. His phonics seemed to vanish when he picked up a pencil; yesterday, he wrote “moc rars” instead of “maki rolls,” which was perplexing for a child who can read complex texts.
After analyzing his work, I began to wonder if something deeper was at play. My research led me to dysgraphia, a writing disorder, and possibly dyslexia. A formal diagnosis would clarify the gap between his reading and writing abilities and provide us with tailored strategies to support him. However, the thought of labeling my gifted son with a learning disability (LD) weighed heavily on my heart.
Leo is what experts refer to as “twice exceptional”—a bright child who also has a learning difference. We had already navigated the emotional landscape when we discovered he shares my husband’s ADHD. I understand the challenges that come with it: issues with attention, social interactions, and decision-making. My husband also deals with dyscalculia, which complicates his ability to manage numbers. Thankfully, technology helps us track our finances.
I worry deeply about how this diagnosis might affect Leo’s future. While I know we can develop strategies to assist him with writing, it’s painful to think that writing might become a chore rather than a joy in his life. Despite the tools we may acquire, I fear he may continue to face challenges. No parent wants to watch their child struggle.
Leo attends a homeschool co-op, where he is aware of his peers’ writing abilities. He sees their neat handwriting and how effortlessly they can produce written content. We’ve tried to explain that his brain operates differently—he’s somewhat familiar with this concept due to his ADHD. I often tell him that it’s not just about trying harder; it’s about trying differently. This is why we’re pursuing an evaluation to identify the best approach for him.
He sometimes responds with, “Maybe I just need to try harder, Mama,” and it tears at my heart because effort alone won’t solve the problem. I reassure him, “You can’t try harder, but you can try differently.” As we prepare for his evaluation, I notice him compensating by asking me how to spell every word. His attempts often still miss the mark, with words like “rars” for “rolls” and “fa” for “the.” Now that I recognize the issues, they’re hard to overlook, and it saddens me to see him struggle through each writing task.
Fortunately, his peers have yet to comment on his handwriting. If they have noticed, their silence is a blessing. The homeschooling community generally embraces diverse learning paces, and I’m grateful for that understanding.
Now, we await a diagnosis with a mix of hope and anxiety. A label will empower Leo to articulate his challenges, allowing him to say, “I have dysgraphia” if needed. It will also provide us with resources to support him better, helping him find joy in writing, regardless of his handwriting quality.
We’ll navigate this journey together, learning how to help him develop compensatory skills. I have faith in his resilience. While the road ahead may be tough, we’ll face it together.
For additional support and information on home insemination, check out this at-home insemination kit. As we focus on Leo’s educational needs, it’s essential to also consider sustainability, which is why I recommend looking into recycling ovums products and packaging for responsible practices in family planning. If you want to learn more about insemination methods, this resource from Cleveland Clinic is a great place to start.
Summary
The journey of parenting a twice-exceptional child can be fraught with challenges and emotions, but understanding and addressing learning differences like dysgraphia can pave the way for better support. Emphasizing the importance of tailored strategies and fostering resilience is essential for helping gifted children who face learning obstacles.