As a mother, I often stumble upon memes and social media posts that humorously express the rollercoaster of emotions we experience. We joke about needing an IV full of coffee to kick off our mornings and a funnel of wine to unwind at night. We share a collective understanding that those Instagram photos of cherubic infants don’t always reflect the chaos behind the scenes, whether it’s toddlers who have decided to explore the depths of the toilet or have transformed themselves into walking Picassos with paint.
These shared moments make us laugh and remind us we’re not alone in this journey. However, they can also mask a deeper truth: the mom guzzling her fifth cup of coffee may be battling exhaustion and isolation; the woman who has turned to a nightly glass of wine might be struggling with a growing dependency; and the friend who frequently cancels plans could be grappling with anxiety that keeps her confined at home.
We often advocate for women to uplift and support one another rather than pass judgment. Yet, many still find it challenging to openly discuss their personal battles. My weekly therapy sessions have become a vital part of my self-care routine, and I don’t shy away from sharing this. Yet, I have encountered comments like, “But you seem so happy! You don’t need therapy, do you?” Such remarks imply shame rather than support. It’s often easier to share stories of self-doubt than to celebrate self-care. We might joke about indulging in a tray of brownies after a tough day but hesitate to acknowledge the importance of prioritizing health, yoga, or therapy sessions.
It’s crucial to recognize that seeking help is not only acceptable but commendable. Engaging in therapy is a journey of personal growth that requires confronting fears, expressing uncomfortable emotions, and accepting the uncontrollable aspects of life. In return, this leads to an empowering awareness of oneself.
I first sought therapy during a period of anxiety and sleepless nights. Initially, I simply wanted support, unaware of the profound changes I was about to embark on. A few years down the line, I emerged transformed, feeling empowered and independent. I even thought I could manage without therapy.
However, years later, I found myself staring into the mirror at a painful bruise on my eye. It became painfully clear that an emotionally abusive relationship had escalated to physical violence. Strangely enough, I was otherwise content in many aspects of my life. Yet, I felt trapped, unable to confide in anyone. Realizing I needed that safe space again, I reached out to my therapist. Her genuine concern during that session validated my feelings, and with the support of family and friends, I found my way back to safety.
That was years ago, but I continue to attend therapy weekly. My life today reflects the incredible progress I’ve made. I’ve found true love and am raising a beautiful daughter alongside my husband. Our families have come together in a show of love and understanding that is unmatched. Every day, I strive to balance my family life with a career I am passionate about.
To those who wonder: Yes, I am truly happy. I openly discuss this happiness in therapy, along with the challenges of transitioning to marriage and motherhood. I share the bittersweet feelings I experience each morning when I leave my daughter and express gratitude for the caring individuals who support her while I work.
I also celebrate the remarkable women I collaborate with, each navigating the demanding balance of family and career. On mornings when I feel like I’m failing at it all, they remind me I am not alone and offer their understanding.
I share this to underscore the power of empathy. When empathy exists, so does awareness, understanding, and acceptance—qualities we often seek when scrolling through our feeds or reminiscing about time spent with friends. If a woman chooses to share her experiences with you, whether they are about joy or despair, achievements or struggles, let your response be one of kindness and support. You may just be the therapy she needs.
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In summary, embracing therapy as part of your self-care routine is a powerful step towards personal growth and happiness. We must foster an environment of empathy and support for all women navigating their journeys.