If you’ve ever shared your grievances in a crowd of mothers, there’s a good chance someone chimed in with, “There’s an oil for that.” I’ll admit, I might have been the one suggesting a dab of peppermint oil on your temples to alleviate that tension headache caused by your toddler’s antics. And while I’m not a die-hard essential oils aficionado, I can vouch that a hint of lavender oil on your pillow can work wonders.
However, there are several essential oils I wish actually existed. With our advancements in science and medicine, it’s baffling we don’t have a “no-whining” oil for our cranky 2-year-olds or an oil that prevents little boys from discussing their anatomy in public. Wouldn’t that be a game changer?
If you’ve ever grabbed your roller bottle, wishing it could magically erase a relentless stomach bug or soothe your little one’s restless nights, you’ll appreciate this list of essential oils that moms secretly yearn for.
Forget-Me-Not Blend
This oil would help remind your child to brush their teeth rather than reenact their favorite video game for the umpteenth time. Perfect for kids who always say, “But I forgot,” and for moms who fear they might forget how to parent after hearing that excuse one more time.
Anti-Eye-Rolling Blend
The classic tween eye roll can be a serious affliction between ages 10 and 13. This oil blend would ensure your child maintains a pleasant demeanor instead of channeling a demon whenever you engage them in conversation. Bonus: it’s also effective for teenagers.
Hurry Up Already Blend
This invigorating blend would be a lifesaver for families always running late. Just apply it to your toddler who can’t find their shoes or the 7-year-old who suddenly needs to use the bathroom right before you leave. You’d never be late again!
Anti-Sunrise Blend
For the energetic toddler who rises at dawn no matter what, this blend would work wonders. Just apply a touch to their pillow at night, and you might enjoy some much-deserved sleep until at least sunrise.
Temper-Tantrum Tamer
This essential oil would be a parent’s best friend while shopping with fussy toddlers. A simple application would help prevent those in-store meltdowns when they beg for the latest toy. Just rub it on your child, and let the tantrums fade away.
Mega Mood Stabilizer
Ideal for tweens and teens who struggle with their emotions, this oil would help keep them calm and collected when faced with mundane inquiries like, “Do you have any homework?” Say goodbye to unnecessary sass!
Open Your Eyes Blend
Perfect for all the family members who can never seem to locate their belongings, this oil would work wonders. A dab on the temples and suddenly they’ll find what they’re looking for without your assistance.
Do It Anyway Blend
This oil would be the perfect solution for motivating reluctant children to tackle tasks they’d rather avoid. Whether it’s finishing dinner or cleaning their room, just diffuse this blend, and watch them comply without a fuss.
Pre-Baby Body Blend
For moms longing for their pre-pregnancy figures, this oil would work miracles to reshape and rejuvenate. With each application, you’d not only regain your body but also a moment of peace and clarity.
Reasonable and Rational Blend
This all-encompassing blend would diffuse tensions among siblings, promoting cooperation and calmness during disagreements. Apply it generously to teach important lessons about sharing and respect.
Bullseye Blend
This robust blend would aid anyone in your household who struggles with accuracy—be it in getting dirty laundry into the hamper or dishes into the dishwasher. Pair it with the “Open Your Eyes” blend for a harmonious home.
Essential oils are celebrated for their ability to alleviate stress, enhance mood, and promote healing. Yet, what mothers truly desire is a return to their sanity, along with a bit of peace and quiet. If they ever create oils for all that, count me in!
For more insights on home insemination and related topics, check out this post on artificial insemination kits. Also, for authoritative information on pregnancy, visit CDC’s pregnancy resource.
In summary, these whimsical essential oils, while fictional, humorously capture the everyday struggles of motherhood. They illustrate a longing for a little extra help in navigating the chaos of raising children.