Dear Partner,
I love you deeply, but I need to be honest: I am utterly exhausted. I’m so tired that even the thought of my fatigue is tiring. Can you understand that? It’s challenging for me to articulate just how worn out I feel because it demands too much energy. I’m drained—completely spent.
When you look at me, I can sense that you’re trying to comprehend my state. I’m a working mom, and that experience is unlike any other. I carry the weight of guilt for not being home with our children every single day, like those “ideal” moms.
I recognize that stay-at-home moms do an incredible job—hard, demanding work. But I’m not built for that life. For me, going to work is like a brief escape, even though I put in a tremendous amount of effort there too. I want my children to see the value of hard work; it’s something I strive for. Still, the guilt of not being present lingers, and it’s overwhelming.
I don’t want you to think poorly of yourself as a husband or father. In fact, you’re among the best, my dear. But instead of trying to “fix” my exhaustion, you could lighten my load in practical ways.
When you see me coming in with a jumble of work papers, school bags, or groceries, please lend a hand. And seriously—keeping track of your own keys and wallet would help alleviate some of my stress.
Feeling Lonely
Another thing: I feel lonely. Working moms often find themselves in isolation. Most of my friends are caught up in the same relentless routine, leaving us little time for each other. The days of casual hangouts and fun outings are gone. When we do manage to get together, it’s a rare moment of comfort and normalcy.
Loneliness is my foe. I need a sense of community, so please support my friendships. Encourage me to go out and reconnect with my friends. But that means you’ll need to take over some responsibilities while I’m away. I know you might want a list of tasks for me to leave behind, but I’m often too exhausted to compile one.
Please take care of our little ones in my absence: prepare their meals, help with homework, and lay out clothes for school, considering their activities. I can’t emphasize enough how important it is that they get a good night’s sleep, as we all suffer when they don’t.
Afterward, do some light chores—clean the kitchen, feed the pets, and pack lunches. If laundry smells musty, rerun it before it sets in. I know I have control issues; I’m working on them. I’ll do my best to come home without critiquing your efforts, no matter how chaotic dinner might have been.
Seeking Support
In closing, I often feel overwhelmed and inadequate. Everything I do seems to receive only a fraction of my attention, and that’s tough. But I’m determined to tackle tomorrow with renewed energy. Can you please remind me that I’m doing well? Your encouragement about my parenting and career efforts would mean the world to me.
I seek solace in your support. Take care of my well-being—not just physically, but emotionally too. A bubble bath, a little romance, and some quiet time would be wonderful. Just remember, I might fall asleep before finishing the song!
I’d love to delve deeper into this, but duty calls. I have chores to complete, emails to send, and kids to attend to.
With love,
Your Working Wife