6 Revolting Childhood Illnesses You Should Know About

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Let’s face it: children can be downright disgusting. Whether they’re spreading germs or smearing their messes all over the house, their antics can make any parent shudder. From sticking their fingers in their noses to neglecting basic hygiene after bathroom breaks, kids have a unique talent for being gross. And when they do get sick, things can escalate quickly. Picture a midnight vomit session or a cough that leaves you covered in phlegm.

As if that weren’t enough, there are certain childhood illnesses that are particularly cringe-inducing. Just the mention of these conditions can send parents into a panic, often contemplating extreme measures like burning the house down to start fresh. One word—“lice”—is enough to send a room full of parents scrambling as they scratch at imaginary itches.

But lice isn’t the only unsightly illness lurking in your child’s world. Arm yourself with hand sanitizer as we delve into some of the most unpleasant childhood ailments:

  1. Molluscum Contagiosum
    When you see the word “contagious,” it’s hard not to feel a wave of panic. Molluscum contagiosum manifests as pink or flesh-toned bumps on the skin. Although it’s catchy, this virus is generally harmless and can often be the reason for a visit to the dermatologist.
  2. Roseola
    This common virus typically strikes before kindergarten, presenting with a high fever followed by a rash. While it’s linked to the herpes virus, there’s no need to panic. Your little one may be a bit cranky, but a glass of wine for you might ease the stress.
  3. Fifth Disease
    This one is as cringe-worthy as it sounds. Fifth disease is a viral infection that often results in a distinctive “slapped cheek” rash. While harmless, the appearance can be alarming, especially since it’s contagious before the rash appears, making it challenging to prevent its spread.
  4. Ringworm
    Despite its name, ringworm isn’t caused by an actual worm. It’s a fungal infection that can create itchy, red patches on the skin. It’s common among kids involved in sports, but rest easy—it’s treatable with antifungal medication.
  5. Conjunctivitis (Pink Eye)
    This goopy eye infection can be caused by various factors, including bacteria, viruses, or allergens. While it usually isn’t serious, the thought of dealing with eye gunk is enough to make any parent cringe. It’s essential to consult a doctor if symptoms arise to determine the appropriate treatment.
  6. Impetigo
    On the gross scale, impetigo ranks quite high due to the unsightly sores it produces. Caused by strep or staph bacteria, this highly contagious condition is most often seen in young children. The good news is that antibiotics can effectively treat it, allowing your child to be back to their usual self in no time.

Before becoming a parent, I rarely faced illness myself. Now, my interactions with the family practice office are frequent, and I’m probably keeping hand sanitizer companies in business. But amidst the chaos of cleaning vomit and disinfecting surfaces, I find solace in knowing that these moments can be excused with a large glass of wine—after all, alcohol kills germs, right?

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Summary

Kids are notorious for being messy, and when illness strikes, their grossness can escalate to new levels. From molluscum contagiosum to impetigo, these childhood ailments are not only contagious but can also be visually disturbing. Being a parent means navigating these challenges while maintaining a sense of humor and perhaps a glass of wine to ease the stress.