As the holiday season approaches, some individuals seem to effortlessly juggle all the festivities—I’m not one of them. I’ve genuinely attempted to embrace every aspect of the holidays; my spirit is as bright as a Christmas light display. If Martha Stewart and Buddy the Elf had a child, that would be me. I deck the halls, whip up festive treats, and blast holiday tunes starting from Halloween all the way through New Year’s. I don’t care if people think I’m over the top; I indulge in these traditions because they bring me joy.
However, over time, I’ve learned that trying to do everything can drain the happiness right out of the season. I’ve decided to conserve my energy for the activities that truly matter, the ones that bring my family joy. I refuse to stretch myself too thin or create unnecessary stress during this time meant for connection and gratitude.
The holidays should be about enjoying each other’s company without the burden of joy-sucking tasks. To that end, I’ve initiated a few new traditions that allow me to spend more time relaxing with a cup of eggnog in hand, rather than crying in the kitchen over a batch of cookies.
A few years back, the women in my family collectively agreed to stop exchanging gifts. With our families expanding and the number of nieces and nephews increasing, it simply became overwhelming. Instead of racing around stores trying to find gifts for each other, we now prioritize quality time together. Our gatherings often include a lovely dinner out—just the ladies—where cooking and cleaning are off the table. I also host a cookie swap where store-bought treats and pajamas are perfectly acceptable. We indulge in sweets and wine, performing our own rendition of “The 12 Days of Christmas.” Trust me; we could give the Rockettes a run for their money!
Memories, after all, are the most treasured gifts. The time and money we save from not buying each other presents allows us to engage in more meaningful activities. For nearly a decade, I’ve taken my kids to our local country store, where they choose a name from the Angel Tree, an experience that teaches them gratitude like nothing else. We also donate holiday meals to the food bank, support St. Jude with generous donations, and even pay for the orders of those behind us in the drive-thru. One year, I surprised a kind woman at our favorite burger place with a bracelet she admired on me. I could hardly wait to give it to her, and I ended up gifting it just after Thanksgiving.
We’ve let go of certain traditions that felt more like burdens, such as sending out holiday cards. While I love receiving them, the stress of creating and mailing them became too much for me. It’s perfectly acceptable to abandon or modify traditions that no longer bring joy or fit your family dynamic.
During the holiday season, I want to savor each moment. I dream of driving around in pajamas, sipping cocoa, and admiring the festive lights. I yearn to create a delightful mess in the kitchen with my kids, making cookies, and savoring raw dough and frosting. Even if our creations don’t turn out perfectly, I cherish the laughter—especially when my son decorates his gingerbread man in amusing ways.
I love browsing Pinterest for inspiring projects, even if I don’t complete them all. Part of the excitement lies in the dreaming. While I appreciate holiday parties, I choose to skip some in favor of quiet evenings at home next to the Christmas tree, with my kids sleeping soundly and my dogs nestled beside me.
Sometimes, true magic exists in silence. It can’t be fabricated; it reveals itself in your kitchen while you recreate your great-grandmother’s cookie recipes or in the smile of a stranger when you perform a simple act of kindness. It’s witnessing your quirky aunt singing carols with your child, reminding you of the warmth and love you felt in your own childhood.
I simply cannot experience this magic while racing from store to store, chasing after material possessions for those who already have plenty. The exhaustion of trying to keep up with every expectation diminishes my ability to appreciate the season. Holidays should be a time of joy for everyone, regardless of how we celebrate.
Choosing to let go of certain obligations to focus on what truly matters will be the best gift you can give yourself and your family. I promise.
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Summary
This article discusses the importance of prioritizing meaningful holiday traditions over the stress of trying to do everything. By letting go of certain customs and focusing on what brings joy, families can create lasting memories and cherish the true essence of the season.